DOCTORS, NURSED AND TEACHERS MAKE A GREAT CONTRIBUTION TO SOCIETY AND SHOULD BE PAYER MORE THAN ENTERTAINMENT AND SPORTS CELEBRITIES. DO YOU AGREE OR DISAGREE.

#doctors #teachers #contribution #society #payer #entertainment #sports #celebrities

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

One of the burning issues of today's

society

is the huge gap between

celebrities

Change noun form

celebrities'

celebrity's

show examples

income and the salary of important jobs

such

teachers

and healthcare agents. I am totally convinced that they should be

payed

Correct your spelling

paid

show examples

more than entertainers. there are many aspects that

makes

Change the verb form

make

show examples

me agree with

this

statement. Heath agents and

teachers

are the roots of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society

well being

Add a hyphen

well-being

show examples

. the former cures the physical and mental diseases and the latter grows the spirit of children, who are the foundation of having a better nation.

Therefore

, we can assume that

teachers

are responsible for

well

Add an article

the well

show examples

being of the soul of the

society

. We can say Entertainment and sports are meaningless in a sick population; So, the former group should be more appreciated and more

payed

Correct your spelling

paid

show examples

. Another viewpoint is the

amout

Correct your spelling

amount

of effort and affection they should put into work.

doctors

Change noun form

doctors'

doctor's

show examples

and

teachers

Change noun form

teachers'

teacher's

show examples

job is to care about individuals and treat them with all their might.

Hence

, more effort and more patience

Change the verb form

are

show examples

required

Change preposition

for

show examples

it to be done

good

Change the word

well

show examples

enough and without error. If

and

Correct your spelling

show examples

entertainer or a

sport

Change the noun form

sports

show examples

celebrity makes a mistake, nothing horrible happens. But if a teacher or a doctor

dose

Correct your spelling

does

show examples

so, it would be a threat to

Correct article usage

the

show examples

life or

Correct article usage

the

show examples

future of a person. To make it brief, doctors, nurses and

teachers

Change noun form

teachers'

teacher's

show examples

job

Fix the agreement mistake

jobs

show examples

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

more important than every other major in

Remove the article

apply

show examples

society

, including celebrities and

sportmans

Correct your spelling

sportsmen

sportsman

. They should highly

being

Change the verb form

show examples

respected and they

most

Correct your spelling

must

show examples

have the highest salary range in

Correct article usage

the

show examples

country. because as mentioned, their occupation is the fundamental of other jobs to be done.

Submitted by mohamad.sanaye462 on Thu Dec 21 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

structure

Ensure that your essay has a clear and logical structure, with distinct introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Each paragraph should have a clear central idea and be linked to other paragraphs using cohesive devices.

grammar

Remember to proofread your essay to correct grammatical errors and improper word choices. Consistent errors can detract from the overall clarity and quality of your writing.

examples

Support your main points with detailed and relevant examples. This not only strengthens your argument but also demonstrates your ability to use language effectively to convey specific information.

task response

Address both sides of the argument to fully meet the task requirements. While it's fine to have a clear opinion, you should also acknowledge opposing viewpoints to show a full understanding of the issue.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
26
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

264 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
The popularity of online education has grown significantly in recen years. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?
Currently, many individuals prefer to play interesting and enjoyable activities with a child to improve their skills and they think that many activities like outdoors are more creative than studying. I will declare both of them with relevant examples in my essay.
5.5
band
Some people feel that governments should control the internet to reduce cybercrime and increase security. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement.
In our modern day and age, technology has opened new worlds such as online trading and banking which concurrently gave a chance for new forms of criminal activities including cyber frauds and breach of security. Some individuals believe that official national authorities should have direct management of online activities to decrease such mischiefs. Strong cyber security regulations should be implemented to avoid creating gaps which can be used by criminals rather than leaning on governmental censorship. In this essay, I will discuss this topic and give my opinion.
8
band
Many people are optimistic of the 21st century and see it as an opportunity to make positive changes to the world.To what extent do you agree or disagree?what changes you like to see in this century?
There is no denying the fact that Optimism for the 21st Century can be a debatable subject. While it is a commonly held belief that some individuals think that making positive changes to the world is easier in the 21st century. In my opinion, I totally agree with this statement because there is a lot of technology that will help.
7
band
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write at least 250 words. Write about the following topic: Companies are responsible only for making money for their investors. Therefore, they should not be held accountable for the environmental and social costs of their business activity to society as a whole. Businesses should do no more than concentrate on making profit. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
The idea that companies are responsible only for making money for their investors and should not be held accountable for the environmental and social costs of their activities is a narrow and outdated perspective. While the pursuit of profit is indeed a fundamental objective of any business, I strongly disagree with the notion that this should be their sole focus. Businesses have a broader role in society, and their operations inevitably impact various stakeholders, including employees, customers, communities, and the environment. Therefore, they must take responsibility for these impacts rather than concentrating solely on financial gain.
5
band
Some people say that shops should sell food products from the local area rather than sell food imported from other country's.Do you agree or disagree?
It is argued that supermarkets have to sell products which is made by local manufactures or farmers instead of marketing with overseas food. Personally, I completely disagree with the idea of restriction foreign products, and would prefer to taste the cultural food of abroad countries.

DOCTORS, NURSED AND TEACHERS MAKE A GREAT CONTRIBUTION TO SOCIETY AND SHOULD BE PAYER MORE THAN ENTERTAINMENT AND SPORTS CELEBRITIES. DO YOU AGREE OR DISAGREE.

Fully explain your ideas

The popularity of online education has grown significantly in recen years. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Some people feel that governments should control the internet to reduce cybercrime and increase security. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement.

Many people are optimistic of the 21st century and see it as an opportunity to make positive changes to the world.To what extent do you agree or disagree?what changes you like to see in this century?

Some people say that shops should sell food products from the local area rather than sell food imported from other country's.Do you agree or disagree?