Young people who commit serious crimes, such as a robbery or a violent attack should be punished in the same way as adults. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #crimes #robbery #attack #adults

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

There is ongoing debate regarding whether youths committing crimes in severe scenarios should be penalized like grown-ups.

This

essay will explore both perspectives that present the points of agreement and disagreement, and arrive at my own conclusion. In

this

hustle-and-bustle society, youngsters should be treated as adults in some legal aspects. It is widely agreed that adolescents must learn to take responsibility for themselves. In

this

way, there is a necessity to punish them for serious crimes.

Furthermore

, another significant reason is to eliminate criminal activities. What is

also

alarming is that plenty of gangsters utilize the vulnerability of laws to induce the youths to commit, so they can get their hands dirty without consequences.

As a result

, the felony should include penalizing young people and the conducters, so those criminals cannot escape as well.

On the other hand

, there are

also

reasons that youngsters should not be punished as adults. It is undeniable that penalizing young people who commit crimes can benefit

this

society.

However

, adolescents earn the right to be forgiven because they are so immature that they conduct various

misbehaviors

Change the spelling

misbehaviours

show examples

. What is obvious is that teenagers are still shapable, and people should educate them from the beginning. Nowadays, society has witnessed that facilities like group houses can accommodate those youths who are misled and provide the correct guidelines to bring them back to the kind. In conclusion, it is evident that taking sanctions against youngsters can bring both positive and negative influences. From my perspective, law enforcement and the government should essentially strike a delicate balance between the weight of punishment.

Submitted by seanlin12345 on Fri Dec 22 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Coherence & Cohesion

Maintain a clear and logical structure throughout the essay. Each paragraph should have a clear purpose and connect logically to others, supporting the overall argument or discussion.

Coherence & Cohesion

Introduction and conclusion need to be more effective. Make sure that the introduction clearly presents the topic and your view, and that the conclusion summarises the points made and restates your position.

Coherence & Cohesion

Provide clearer topic sentences and more developed supporting details. Ensure that each paragraph expands on a central idea and uses evidence or examples to support assertions.

Task Achievement

Ensure you respond completely to all parts of the task. This includes not only addressing the prompt but also providing a clear opinion and maintaining that position throughout the essay.

Task Achievement

Develop ideas more comprehensively. Ideas should be clear and detailed, offering depth and understanding of the topic.

Task Achievement

Use relevant and specific examples to support your points. Examples should clearly relate to the topic and provide concrete evidence that reinforces your arguments.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

264 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4.5
band
The average standard of people's health is likely to be lower in the future than it is now. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
It is preticted that people's well-being and mental health will be worse in future than now. I strongly agree with this statement because Sedentary lifestyle and consuming unhealthy foods that lead to bring this toxic situation. This essay will examine for the following reasons.
<4
band
There are millions of vehicles on the road nowadays, and the number is predicted to increase in the future. Many argue that alternative forms of transport should be encouraged and laws introduced to control car ownership and use. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Last decades transports amount rise day by day and it is estimated the number to go up in the future.
4
band
Few people devote time to hobbies nowadays. Say why you think this is the case and what effect this has on the individual and society in general. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
These days many individuals invest time on their favorite activities from various fields. I think main reason of this is because people consider it as a break for themselves from everyday life and it increases their overall productivity. In addition, this practice has great impact on society in terms of promoting healthy lifestyle and making socializing easier in today's busy lives.
6
band
Air travel can only benefit the richest people in the world. Ordinary people can get no advantage with the development of air travel. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays, using aircraft making our travels more easier and enjoyable. Although the establishment of airline companies around the world , as well as increasing competition levels, provides more choices for all community members including low -income people.
7
band
Some people say that large, impressive buildings are important for a city. Others believe that the money should be spent on improving schools and hospitals. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion
In this day and age, city planning is an essential problem, which requires suitable policies to develop the economy and ensure the life of residents. Some individuals suppose that enormous, eye-catching buildings are vital for a city. Others assume that the government should invest in expanding schools and hospitals.

Young people who commit serious crimes, such as a robbery or a violent attack should be punished in the same way as adults. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

The average standard of people's health is likely to be lower in the future than it is now. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

There are millions of vehicles on the road nowadays, and the number is predicted to increase in the future. Many argue that alternative forms of transport should be encouraged and laws introduced to control car ownership and use. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Few people devote time to hobbies nowadays. Say why you think this is the case and what effect this has on the individual and society in general. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Air travel can only benefit the richest people in the world. Ordinary people can get no advantage with the development of air travel. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that large, impressive buildings are important for a city. Others believe that the money should be spent on improving schools and hospitals. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion