IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The table and charts below give information on the police bugjet for 2017 and 2018 in one area of Britain. The table shows where the money come from and the charts show how it was distributed.

The table and charts below give information on the police bugjet for 2017 and 2018 in one area of Britain. The table shows where the money come from and the charts show how it was distributed.
#information #police #bugjet #area #britain #money #show
The table chart illustrates the data
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
on the
police
 cost;
whereas
 the histogram charts provide information about how the
money
 was spent in small
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
 of Britain between 2017 and 2018.
Overall
,
it is clear that
 the total
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
police
 budget rose steadily,
while
 the information
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
 how the
money
 was spent
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
 salaries
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
declined sharply during the period. Looking for more details
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
table
Add an article
the table
show examples
, the sources of
police
 budget were four
differents
Correct your spelling
different
show examples
 types from 2017 to 2018.
Moreover
, the all of types
sources
Change preposition
of sources
show examples
 of
police
cost
Fix the agreement mistake
costs
show examples
 increased sharply.
Similarly
, at National
Govermant
Correct your spelling
government
 rose from 175.5m to 177.8m and by Local Taxes, 102.3m increased from 91.2m.
Furthermore
, from other sources went up to 85,5m by
started
Verb problem
apply
show examples
38m.
According to
 the pie charts, the
police
 budget
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
how
Rephrase
apply
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
was distributed were three different types
by
Change preposition
of
show examples
 the same token.
However
, the
police
Correct quantifier usage
number of police
show examples
 who spent
money
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
 salaries went down sharply from 75% to 60%,
while
,
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the person who spent
money
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
 technology rose sharply
at
Change preposition
from
show examples
 8% to 14%.
In contrast
, the
police
 who spent
money
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
 buildings and transport
remaind
Correct your spelling
remained
remains
remain
 stable at 17%.
Submitted by musa.nuwa on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words police, money, m with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "information" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "went up" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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