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Writing Samples
Band 6

The table below shows the percentages of the population by age groups in one town who rode bicycles in 2011.

The table below shows the percentages of the population by age groups in one town who rode bicycles in 2011.
#percentages #population #age #groups #town #bicycles
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The table gives a comparison of population proportion in one town who rode bicycles in 2011 between five
age
Use synonyms
 groups.
Overall
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, most cycling
group
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 of both
genders
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 are children between
age
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 0-9,
in contrast
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 of adults between
age
Use synonyms
 40-59, which proportion are lowest. Data on the figures illustrates that children between
age
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 0-9 have small difference in
genders
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: females are 51.4% and males are 50.3%. Next
age
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group
Use synonyms
 between 10-17 shows the significant change in proportion: 42.2% and 24.6% respectively.
Age
Use synonyms
group
Use synonyms
 between 18-39 experienced dramatically fall in both
genders
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 to 17.1% and 9.7% respectively. Compared with other
age
Use synonyms
 groups,
age
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group
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 between 40-59 illustrates the lowest usage of bicycle in both
genders
Use synonyms
: females are 12.3% and males are 8%.
Finally
Linking Words
 data on the figures shows that adults 60 and more olds preferred ride bicycles more than other adults
age
Use synonyms
 groups and experienced slightly increase 18.5% and 13.2% respectively.
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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words age, group, genders with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "illustrates" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 3 times.
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