it is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

Some believe that taking
risks
is necessary for both professional and personal lives,
while
others do not agree with that since it can give more disadvantages than potential benefits.
This
essay strongly argues that taking
risks
is not only crucial for the corporate career, but
also
it can potentially help us to have a much better life and achieve
the
Change the word
our
show examples
most ambitious goals
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
ours
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
in the future. Let me explain why
this
is the case.
Firstly
, taking
risks
can make a big difference
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
shaping who we are in several decades later. If we just live in our comfort zone
as
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apply
show examples
the way it is,
then
we will not have many chances to develop ourselves to be a better version of
us
Correct pronoun usage
ourselves
show examples
.
This
is true not only when we are working at a company, but
also
in the moments when we need to decide a lot of important things in our personal lives. The most common example for the former case is the situation when we are offered a promotion by our supervisor. Many people avoid that opportunity since they are afraid to take
bigger
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on bigger
show examples
responsibilities. For the latter one, it is often faced when we need to choose our partner in life or the decision to stay with our parents in the same house or not. Notice that many of the most influential people in the world suffered a lot from poverty, broken
home
Replace the word
homes
show examples
, and other problems when they were a child.
Secondly
, taking
risks
can prevent us
to have
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from having
show examples
a regret
feeling
Verb problem
apply
show examples
in the future. If we are not brave enough with any chance given to us,
then
there is a quite big probability that we will feel guilty when we are already old for not considering that opportunity.
However
, if we are determined to take some actions even
those
Correct word choice
if those
show examples
are associated with various
risks
,
then
we will not feel regret at all even though in the process we failed to achieve our initial objectives because every failure will teach us important moral values and lessons helping us to see the world with better perspectives. In conclusion, the advantages of taking
risks
outweigh all of its possible disadvantages since it will make us a better and stronger person.
In addition
to that, it will
also
avoid
Verb problem
prevent
show examples
us
for
Change preposition
from
show examples
having regret
feeling
Verb problem
apply
show examples
in the future
due to
fear
Correct article usage
the fear
show examples
and anxiety that we have nowadays.
Submitted by ravialdyhidayat on

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Task Response
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea, which is developed and not just stated. Expand on points by providing more specific examples and detail.
Coherence & Cohesion
Though the overall structure is clear, be mindful of the transitions between ideas. Use a range of cohesive devices and topic sentences that synthesize the content of the paragraphs for improved flow and clarity.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Opportunities
  • Growth
  • Innovation
  • Challenges
  • Self-discovery
  • Resilience
  • Uncertainty
  • Consequences
  • Calculated risks
  • Stagnation
  • Regret
  • Comfort zone
  • Entrepreneurship
  • Adventurous spirit
  • Thriving
  • Failure
  • Mitigate
  • Reap the rewards
What to do next:
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