The richer countries of the world spend billions on space travel and space exploration. Do you think this is a good use of money? What in your opinion could be done to better use the resources of a country?

#countries #world #billions #space #travel #exploration #money #resources #country

Wealthier nations are likely to spend significant

investment

Fix the agreement mistake

investments

show examples

into

Change preposition

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space exploration and travel. In

this

essay, I will discuss why

this

is not a good use of money and form a conclusion.

Although

Remove the comma

apply

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learning about our galaxy and outer space is interesting, it has no direct impact on our lives. There are more pressing issues that are

effecting

Correct your spelling

affecting

show examples

our population,

such

increased

Correct article usage

the increased

show examples

cost of

the

Correct article usage

apply

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living crisis and these are more deserving of our money.

Furthermore

, the majority of the nation has no care for these voyages because they do not change the standard of

our

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

living. In fact, huge governmental funding generated towards these missions

further

heightens the sense that the general public

are

Change the verb form

show examples

not cared for. It is only the rich that benefit within a society and not the working class. A more beneficial investment by politicians would be strategies to improve living conditions.

For instance

, exploring ways to equalise occupational wages so that everyone is able to afford basic necessities like food and water. It would be advisable that the infrastructure of

such

nations was funded so that the people of that land

can

Wrong verb form

could

show examples

prosper. To illustrate

this

further

, healthcare facilities and educational institutions should have monetary funding generated towards them, as

this

will lead to a healthier and

knowledgeable

Correct quantifier usage

more knowledgeable

show examples

society. If everyone is provided with sufficient medicinal treatment and learning,

this

will in turn cause an influx of careers and educated people.

Additionally

this

will benefit the country’s economy as more of the population

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

working in an occupational role.

Moreover

, successful universities

promote

Verb problem

encourage

show examples

students from all over the world to come and study in that area, again contributing to the nation’s economy. In conclusion, there are more advantageous avenues richer countries could focus on,

such

as education and health.

Submitted by abeera2012 on Mon Dec 25 2023

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introduction conclusion

Ensure the introduction clearly defines your position on the topic, gives a preview of the main points, and directly addresses the essay prompt. The conclusion should restate your thesis and summarize your arguments, without introducing new information.

coherence cohesion

Develop a clear paragraph structure with topic sentences that introduce the main idea of each paragraph. Make sure each paragraph has a clear focus and use cohesive devices effectively to link ideas and paragraphs together.

task achievement

Fully address all parts of the task prompt by expanding on your ideas with specific examples and explanations. Each paragraph should support your position with reasoned arguments. Avoid general statements without concrete examples.

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

295 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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The richer countries of the world spend billions on space travel and space exploration. Do you think this is a good use of money? What in your opinion could be done to better use the resources of a country?

Nowadays, celebrities are more known for their glamour and wealth than their accomplishments and this is setting a bad example for the youngsters. Do you agree or disgaree with the statement ?

Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages?

Art is considered an essential part of all cultures throughout the world. However, these days fewer and fewer people appreciate art and turn their focus to science, technology and business. Why do you think this is? What could be done to encourage more people to take interest in the arts?

Many people believe that good planning is the key factor to success in life, while others believe that other factors like hard work or luck are important. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that to be successful at a sport you need a natural ability and others think that hard work and practice can make successful. Discuss both views and give your opinion?