When a country develops its technology, the traditional skills and ways of life die out. It is pointless to try and keep them alive. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

Old traditional
skills
and lifestyles are dying
due to
technological advances. It is a contentious issue. Many individuals believe that it is pointless to put too much effort into saving it. In my opinion, I don’t agree that it’s pointless saving the traditional
skills
and techniques. In the following paragraphs, I shall explain my point of view and provide supporting reasons. Many traditions and talents throughout the world are being abandoned and replaced by machines in
this
new technological era. One of the most prominent instances of
this
phenomenon is the worldwide decline in hand-made fabrics. Today, factories create millions of machine-printed fabrics, which have replaced hand-knitted fabrics. The production costs are reduced, and designs appeal to the majority of buyers throughout the world,
due to
which many artists have lost their jobs. Local marketplaces are dwindling in popularity and people are suffering.
Besides
that, life is becoming computerized, forcing ancient practices to become obsolete. Conventional
skills
provide innovative ideas for the development of modern technologies. Our predecessors’ invisible
thread
Fix the agreement mistake
threads
show examples
of old traditional
skills
and practices connect us with them. It helps us learn how things are created better to understand our culture, community, and nationality. These talents and
skills
help define and communicate a group’s beliefs and abilities,
as well as
how they interact with their environment.
However
, technology has indeed made the life of people simpler. Almost everything nowadays is done with contemporary technology, which makes physical labour easier. Yet, one cannot overlook the wealth of knowledge that individuals gain from traditional
skills
and techniques.
Overall
, traditional
skills
and practices are undeniably dwindling. One must acknowledge that traditional
skills
and techniques are a means of tying people together and educating them about their culture, society, country, and many other topics.
Submitted by hiteshpaul on

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task achievement
Your essay addresses the task but could be improved by providing more depth to the main points with additional examples and clearer expansion of ideas.
coherence cohesion
Although there is a basic structure to your essay, it could benefit from more varied and complex sentence structures. Coherence could further be enhanced by ensuring smoother transitions between ideas.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • technological advancement
  • traditional skills
  • ways of life
  • cultural significance
  • heritage
  • mass production
  • craftsmanship
  • cultural identities
  • future generations
  • traditional crafts
  • economic benefits
  • sustainable alternatives
  • environmentally friendly
  • harmonious society
  • innovation and heritage
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