Some students work while studying. This often results in lacking time for education and constantly feeling under pressure. What do you think are the causes of this? high tuition fees supporting family What solutions can you suggest? grants , scholarships , apply for less courses in each semester

#students #work #results #time #education #pressure #tuition #fees #grants #scholarships #courses #semester

Nowadays students work

while

studying

invesely

Correct your spelling

inversely

intensely

affecting their academic performance and causing mental pressure.

This

essay will delve into the causes of

this

issue and put forward some practical solutions to address it. First and foremost, one of the obvious

reason

Fix the agreement mistake

reasons

show examples

Change preposition

for

show examples

the part-time jobs are the high

tution

Correct your spelling

tuition

fees and living expenses.

In other words

, educational institutions are immensely

increase

Wrong verb form

increased

show examples

their

tution

Correct your spelling

tuition

fees in

last

Correct article usage

the last

show examples

decade which

causes

Wrong verb form

has caused

show examples

financial implications for

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

middle income

Add a hyphen

middle-income

show examples

families.

For example

, a renowned university in the UK

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

increased their

tution

Correct your spelling

tuition

fees

Change preposition

show examples

20%

Change preposition

apply

show examples

last

year.

Moreover

, living expenses in major cities are increased

inclusing

Correct your spelling

including

house rents.

As a result

, students are forced to do part-time jobs to meet

thier

Correct your spelling

their

financial needs.

Submitted by ck.manshad on Tue Dec 26 2023

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structure

Your essay has a clear introduction but lacks a conclusive paragraph. Ensure that every essay has a distinct conclusion summarizing your arguments and restating your position.

content

While you identify causes such as high tuition fees and living expenses, and part-time jobs as solutions, the essay does not address supporting family as a cause nor does it discuss grants, scholarships, or taking fewer courses as potential solutions. Expand your essay to cover all the points mentioned in the essay prompt for a more complete response.

coherence

The logical flow of ideas is present, but could be improved with better transition between sentences and paragraphs. Use phrases like 'In addition,' 'Furthermore,' or 'Consequently' to make connections between ideas clearer.

development

Providing a specific example is good, but try to include more varied examples or evidence to support your points. Also, consider mentioning some solutions in more depth, i.e., how grants and scholarships could alleviate financial stress, or the benefits of taking fewer courses per semester.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16Grammar mistakes
 

2 paragraphs

119 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some students work while studying. This often results in lacking time for education and constantly feeling under pressure. What do you think are the causes of this? high tuition fees supporting family What solutions can you suggest? grants , scholarships , apply for less courses in each semester

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Task 2 It is important for everyone, including young people, to save money for their future. To what extent do you agree ir disagree with this statement?

Online education is becoming increasingly popular nowadays. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this format?

Write a letter to the information officer at the tape information office asking for information about the tertiary preparation certificate. Describe your education background and your reason for wanting to do the course

Nowadays, advertising becomes increasingly popular in the markets. The firms are using various forms of adverts to popularize the novelty of their products to the public in order to make more profit.

It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?