The charts below give information about attendance at entertainment venues and admission prices to those venues in 2009.

The charts below give information about attendance at entertainment venues and admission prices to those venues in 2009.
IELTS Writing Task Chart for The charts below give information about attendance at entertainment venues and admission prices to those venues in 2009.
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The chart shows information that in 2009, the highest number of attendance at entertainment venues
is
Wrong verb form
was

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb is. Consider changing it.

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the number of
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

going to the cinemas. One of the reasons why
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot

If you don’t want alot to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

of
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

prefer to watch the cinema
in
Correct your spelling
is

The word in doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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because the
ticket
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

cost is cheaper compared to admission
ticket
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices

It seems that price may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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for other entertainment activities. The
ticket
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

price for one person is $15 and if someone
decide
Change the verb form
decides

It appears that the indefinite pronoun someone does not agree with the verb decide in your sentence. Consider changing the form of the verb.

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to
brought
Change the verb
bring

It appears that the verb brought should be in the base form as part of the to-infinitive following decide. Consider changing the verb form.

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more
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

with them, there is a discount available where tickets for 4
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

the
ticket
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

only
costs
Correct subject-verb agreement
cost

It seems that the verb costs does not agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

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$55. The chart
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

shows that there's sports
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

event
Fix the agreement mistake
events

It seems that event may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are

It seems that the verb is does not agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

show examples
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

a popular
event
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

but the number of attendance
to
Change preposition
at

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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the
game
Fix the agreement mistake
games

It seems that game may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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is very low.
Due to
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

the fact, that
2009
Correct article usage
the 2009

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
football game admission
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
ticket
Fix the agreement mistake
tickets

It seems that ticket may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are

It seems that the verb is does not agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

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more expensive rather than
movies
Fix the agreement mistake
movie

It seems that movies may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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or theme
parks
Fix the agreement mistake
park tickets

It seems that parks ticket may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
ticket
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. We can conclude, that the most popular entertainment
event
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

in 2009
is
Wrong verb form
was

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb is. Consider changing it.

show examples
watching movies in the cinema. Following that, there are
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

who took
interest
Correct article usage
an interest

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
on
Change preposition
in

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
theme
park
Fix the agreement mistake
parks

It seems that park may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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and sports
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
event
Fix the agreement mistake
events

It seems that event may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words people, ticket, event with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • attendance
  • entertainment venues
  • admission prices
  • visitors
  • comparison
  • percentage
  • revenue
  • cost-effective
  • correlation
  • trends
  • marketing strategies
  • fluctuations
  • cultural events
  • accessibility
  • demographics
  • peak season
  • off-peak
  • consumer behavior
  • pricing strategy
  • profit margin
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