Some people think that success is the best measure for intelligence, while others think that intelligence can be measured in other ways.

A number of
people
consider that success is the best measure
for
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of
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intelligence
,
meanwhile
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meanwhile,
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there are those who claim that
intelligence
can be estimated in other different ways. Personally, I believe the first statement is true. *The reason is that everyone desires to be successful. Apparently, not all
the
Correct article usage
apply
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people
get to
such
point
Correct article usage
a point
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. That’s why I consider it requires a specific state of mind, at the same time a person has to be mentally prepared.
Moreover
, being successful is not just
a luck
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luck
a bit of luck
a stroke of luck
a piece of luck
show examples
, I truly believe humans can develop
intelligence
skills to achieve their goals.
Firstly
, in order to
get
Verb problem
be
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successful, a certain number of actions
has
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have
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to be accomplished. It’s doubtful that someone ignorant could get to
a
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apply
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prosperity
,
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apply
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unless it is luck. I guess what I am trying to say is that
people
have every possibility in the whole world to develop personal traits to become mentally stronger. It is all in their hands.
For instance
, I am surrounded by friends who constantly prove
me
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to me
show examples
that self-development beats
the
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apply
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luck or talent.
Secondly
, everyone perceives success differently.
While
for some
people
it means richness or a perspective job, for others having a
complete
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completely
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loving family is above anything else.
In other words
,
this
phenomenon is very subjective. As an example, our president can be picked out.
As a result
of her dignified career, building a family was left behind.
Therefore
, she has
got
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apply
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her own perception of goal-achieving, which,
as a result
,
required
Wrong verb form
requires
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a certain level of
intelligence
.
To conclude
, depending on what an achievement means to
people
, they choose their personal path of personal growth to help them get there. On the whole, with hard work and dedication anything is possible.
Submitted by acaitaz on

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coherence cohesion
You should ensure that your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Introduce the topic comprehensively, explain your ideas in detailed paragraphs, and provide a conclusive summary at the end.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure could be improved by properly organizing paragraphs and ensuring each one has a clear central idea followed by supporting sentences that expand on that idea.
coherence cohesion
Use a range of cohesive devices to smoothly connect ideas and paragraphs. This could include conjunctions, pronouns, and transition phrases, among others.
task achievement
Make sure to directly address the question prompt and answer all parts of the task. Your argument should directly reflect the topic and provide a clear response.
task achievement
Develop clear and comprehensive ideas with more depth. Ideas should be fully expanded upon and explained with clarity, rather than just being listed or mentioned.
task achievement
Include relevant and specific examples to support your main points. Examples should be directly related to the topic and help illustrate your points more clearly.

Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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