some argue that univercites should be a place for all of the topices other ague that it only about one sepsific field / discoss both share your idea

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These days,
universities
are becoming one of the most integral parts of our educational journey.
while
some
people
argue that it should teach a
lot
of topics to their
students
, others contend that these places should be limited only to specific fields. l overwhelmingly agree with the first mindset. One of the most significant aspects of the
universities
that are covering a
lot
of dates is the enhancement of creativity, which is the common belief among the majority of the
people
. They argue that these
universities
provide unique opportunities where
students
can immerse themselves in a wide range of information
that is
useful for them not only in their current position but
also
in about unpredictable future.
For instance
, when
students
from other departments participate in another course, over time,
this
burdens their knowledge, which leads to flourishing in their careers.
Moreover
,
such
interaction increases the exposure of these
people
to special ideas and new approaches to handle a
lot
of challenges that may happen to them.
In other words
, it shapes their critical- thinking when they really need them. I firmly believe that it boosts the confidence of these
students
to talk about their mindset more accurately. It helps them to show their knowledge to gain a better position among the
people
who love them.
For example
, when we have a
lot
of data about other fields, not only our career that we spend tremendous effort on , we can capture the attention of most
people
which most of the time leads to fostering strong relationships with strangers.
Moreover
, it plays like a catalyst in our future by finding a better job opportunity for us. It means that by becoming the focal point in each meeting unconsciously, some
people
are seeking a person who is alert to a
lot
of data to help them to grow in their thriving way.
Thus
, learning a
lot
of skills can guarantee a better life for us. Some
people
argue that gathering a
lot
of information is universal for the
students
because it disrupts their goals and can create a strong sense of confusion for them. l completely rejects
this
mindset. being in
such
an environment not only stops us from following our dreams of upward mobility but
also
guides us to continue the way that we started before. In conclusion,
universities
play a critical role in nurturing
students
and creating places that share a
lot
of data with them can help their participation to thrive in their way
Submitted by homa.nazrmian56 on

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language use
Work on refining grammatical accuracy and sentence structure to ensure your essay reads more smoothly. This will enhance clarity and reduce potential misunderstandings.
task response
Consider enhancing the examples provided with more detailed or concrete instances to reinforce the arguments further.
task achievement
The essay effectively presents both viewpoints on whether universities should cover a wide range of topics or focus on specific fields, fulfilling the task requirement of discussing both sides.
coherence and cohesion
The essay includes a clear introduction and conclusion, helping to frame the discourse effectively.
task achievement
Main points are clearly supported with arguments and relevant explanations, making the essay comprehensible and engaging.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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