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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The graph below shows the average daily sales of selected food items at the Brisk Cafe by season. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows the average daily sales of selected food items at the Brisk Cafe by season. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#sales #food #items #cafe #season #information #features #comparisons
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The bar shows a comparison of
ordered
Add an article
an ordered
the ordered
show examples
 menu in
Use synonyms
Winter
Correct article usage
the Winter
show examples
 and
Summer
Use synonyms
 Seasons at Brisk Cafe.
Overall
Linking Words
, we can see that average daily
sales
Use synonyms
varies
Correct subject-verb agreement
vary
show examples
 among
five
Correct article usage
the five
show examples
 menus in
Summer
Use synonyms
, but not in
Winter
Use synonyms
. People tend to pick hot coffee when the
winter
Use synonyms
 comes. Looking at the graph closely, hot coffee is the most
favorite
Change the spelling
favourite
show examples
things
Fix the agreement mistake
thing
show examples
 in
Winter
Use synonyms
.
It is clear that
Linking Words
 the total
sales
Use synonyms
 of that menu reach the peak at more than 70. Not only that, but soup is
also
Linking Words
being
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
the best seller menu in
Winter
Use synonyms
. Meanwhile
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the other side, iced coffee becomes the
lowest ordered
Add a hyphen
lowest-ordered
show examples
 food which is almost no
sales
Use synonyms
, but things become different in
Summer
Use synonyms
 when the servings number of it increase to it is highest level.
Beside
Replace the word
Besides
show examples
 that, ice cream is the people's second
choices
Fix the agreement mistake
choice
show examples
 in
Summer
Use synonyms
. It is shown
at
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the
day by day
Add a hyphen
day-by-day
show examples
 servings that more than 30
order
Fix the agreement mistake
orders
show examples
.
In addition
Linking Words
, if we look
to
Change preposition
at
show examples
 other menus, there is Salad that
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 no changes in
sales
Use synonyms
 whether it is
winter
Use synonyms
 or
summer
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by mmmuuu on

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words winter, summer, sales with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • average daily sales
  • selected food items
  • seasonal variation
  • popular
  • peak
  • consumer preferences
  • anomalies
  • transition seasons
  • trends
  • comfort food
  • beverage
  • snack
  • consume
  • highlight
  • fluctuations
  • correspond
  • plummet
  • soar
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