In recent year sports star have become increasingly famous and wealthy. For some this is a benefit, raising the profile of sports, but for others it is a negative influence. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Sports
stars are very popular
in
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apply
show examples
nowadays. Many producers and directors attract
the
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apply
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audiences by
adversting
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advertising
with
the
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apply
show examples
famous
people
in
sports
. But, it
become
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becomes
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threadened
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threatened
to
Add an article
a sport
show examples
sport
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sports
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team that
sport
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sports
show examples
stars might not have fully concentration on their
sport
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sports
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activities. It has to be considered some factors to give an opinion on
this
matter.
Firstly
, there can be seen a lot of young
people
become more
fastinated
Correct your spelling
fascinated
in
the
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apply
show examples
sports
because of fame and money.
Beside
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Besides
show examples
, digital marketing
are
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is
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very trendy and popular so
people
do
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apply
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advertise their products on social media who
has
Verb problem
are
show examples
famous in
sports
because they are fit and healthy
that
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apply
show examples
can attract
the
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apply
show examples
audiences very well. It cannot be denied that
sports
stars can get lots of income from that they are more likely to invest their
engry
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energy
angry
and time on that.
Secondly
, it can give unrealistic dreams to
younger
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the younger
a younger
show examples
generation and they might get distracted to make
a
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the
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right choice for their career pathways. As long as they take part in social media, they have to be very careful
their
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about their
show examples
social status
that
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so that
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they
would
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will
show examples
get tension from it and it will
effect
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affect
show examples
to
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apply
show examples
their
sports
abilities in future.
Finally
,
sports
people
can reach the top
in
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within
show examples
a
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the
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limit of their lifetime so they should use effectively on their fame to be more financially stable. But
this
should not be the main
reasons
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reason
show examples
to be
sport
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sports
show examples
people
just for popularity and money. It is not possible that
sports
people
with not let go
their
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of their
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opportunites
Correct your spelling
opportunities
anyway but the trend of more money and
attentions
Fix the agreement mistake
attention
show examples
are not beneficial to
sports
overall
.
Submitted by cupidzunzun on

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coherence cohesion
The essay needs a clear introduction and conclusion to frame the discussion. Ensure that the introduction sets the context and presents the topic clearly, while the conclusion should summarise the main points and restate your opinion.
coherence cohesion
Organise your essay into clear and logical paragraphs, each focusing on a distinct main point. Use transition words and phrases to improve flow and enhance the connection between ideas.
coherence cohesion
Develop your main points with specific examples and explanations. Each paragraph should focus on one key idea, and be expanded with evidence or examples to support your arguments.
task achievement
Make sure you fully address all parts of the task by discussing both views and providing a clear opinion. It's important to spend time analyzing the prompt to ensure your essay fully responds to all its aspects.
task achievement
Clarify your ideas by providing comprehensive perspectives on the topic. Explore each view with balanced consideration and avoid overly generalized statements.
task achievement
Include relevant and specific examples to illustrate your points. These add credibility to your arguments and demonstrate a deeper understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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