IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Vaccinating children against preventing diseases is not only unnecessary but also dangerous to waht extend do you agree or disagree?

#children #diseases #waht
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Infectious
diseases
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 have become a major concern in every part of the world for a long time. Infectious
diseases
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 create harm and significant disadvantages for a specific place or country.
Vaccines
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 are designed to induce the human immune
system
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 against parasites that cause infectious
diseases
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. Recognizing the mechanism of
vaccines
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 to create a robust immune
system
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, I disagree that
vaccines
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 are not necessary and dangerous.
First,
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the purposes and effects of
vaccines
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 can be linked by
people
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 living in certain countries or places.
People
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 with immunodeficiency conditions, followed by older
people
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, are the most sensitive groups to be infected.
Vaccines
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 are essential as they can create herd immunity, a
system
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 where
children
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, teenagers, and stronger
people
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 are given vaccine shots. Soon they will develop stronger immune systems against certain parasites that could protect the weaker ones.
Secondly
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,
vaccines
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 could induce the human immune
system
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 by an active mechanism, which may cause adverse effects on the human
body
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.
Therefore
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, it is customary to get adverse reactions
such
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 as itching, fever, and other health conditions because the
body
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 is creating a more robust immune
system
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. The final reason might be linked to the effect of unvaccinated
children
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. As seen in the statement,
vaccines
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 provide preventive therapy where they contain antigens that are less infectious to the human
body
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.
This
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 could give the
body
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 extra protection if it gets infected someday. Infectious
diseases
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such
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 as Covid-19, HPV, and hepatitis can cause significant harm, especially to
children
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. A complex therapy regimen is
also
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 needed if someone has already gotten infected. In conclusion, vaccine therapy has many advantages as it can provide a stronger immune
system
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 and create a better environment for society.
However
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, not all
children
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 can get vaccinated. Parents need to understand their
children
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's health condition, and it is a must for the
children
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 to be examined first by healthcare workers before receiving the
vaccines
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.
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introduction conclusion presence
Ensure that your introduction and conclusions are clear and fully developed, rather than perfunctory. Both should serve their distinct purposes in framing your essay's argument.
logical structure
When writing your essay, make sure your ideas are organized into clear paragraphs. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea and logically flowing sentences that support the main idea.
supported main points
Support your main points with specific examples and elaborations to make your argument more convincing and robust.
complete response
Ensure that your response fully addresses all parts of the task, providing a balanced view or a clear position throughout your essay.
clear comprehensive ideas
Work on refining the clarity of your ideas and ensuring they are well-explained and comprehensive, leaving no room for ambiguity.
relevant specific examples
Utilize specific, real-world examples that directly support your argument or viewpoint. This lends credibility and weight to your writing.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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