Why do people at some stage changed their career? Discuss one main reason, and state your opinion about this?

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Some people
changed
Wrong verb form
change

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb changed. Consider changing it.

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their
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

career
Fix the agreement mistake
careers

It seems that career may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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at some point for different reasons. Personally, I think many who are
their
Change preposition
in their

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working stage may have switched
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Use synonyms
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs

It seems that job may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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depending on their own objective. Undeniably, there are several factors that could influence individuals to shift
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Use synonyms
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs

It seems that job may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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,
hence
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, in my
mind
Add a comma
mind,

It appears that you are missing a comma after the introductory phrase in my mind. Consider adding a comma.

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one
Correct determiner usage
the

It seems that determiner use may be incorrect here.

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biggest reason is that they’re not happy about their roles. No
one
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

would ever stay put in
one
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

place unless they enjoy their position; I guess everyone would agree with me on
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

.
For instance
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, my friend who previously worked in a great company that
offers
Wrong verb form
offered

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb offers. Consider changing it.

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high
Correct article usage
a high

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salary with additional benefits, chose to leave just because she
doesn’t
Wrong verb form
didn’t

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb does. Consider changing it.

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feel blissful about it. After quitting she decided to work with
a
Correct article usage
the

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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private sector
who
Correct pronoun usage
that

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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extends
Wrong verb form
extending

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb extends. Consider changing it.

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help to the needy;
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

job
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

offers her
low
Correct article usage
a low

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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salary but, up till now she is still with
the
Correct your spelling
them

The word the doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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,
Remove the comma
apply

It appears that you have an unnecessary comma before the dependent clause marker since. Consider removing the comma.

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since she
felt
Wrong verb form
feels

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb felt. Consider changing it.

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contentment with what she does.
For
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

reason, I could say that against all
odd’s
Change noun form
odd

It seems that this noun form may be incorrect.

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changing
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
career
Fix the agreement mistake
careers

It seems that career may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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is not so bad at all if you
will
Verb problem
apply

There may be a verb use issue here.

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find the right
one
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. From my own perspective changing
one
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

’s
career
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

depends on the need of a person. Even though
one
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

is doing
a
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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great with their duty,
one
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

may transfer
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs

It seems that job may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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.
For instance
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
one
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

may feel they can’t manage their time well given their priorities
,
Remove the comma
apply

It appears that you have an unnecessary comma before the dependent clause marker since. Consider removing the comma.

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since
time
Add an article
the time

The noun phrase time frame seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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frame of working schedules
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is

It seems that the verb are does not agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

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fixed and adjustments are impossible
thus
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

for them having their own time is much more convenient.
Therefore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, individuals who
had
Wrong verb form
have

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb had. Consider changing it.

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another
Fix the agreement mistake
other careers

It seems that another career may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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career
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

varies
Correct subject-verb agreement
vary

It seems that the verb varies does not agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

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according to
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

their own situation.
Overall
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, switching
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
one
Change preposition
from one

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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career
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

to another
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is

It seems that the verb are does not agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

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defined by several factors,
nevertheless
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, feeling unhappy is
one
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

of the biggest factors that
had encouraged
Wrong verb form
encourages

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb had encouraged. Consider changing it.

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them to
changed
Change the form of the verb
change

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb changed. Consider changing it.

show examples
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
career
Fix the agreement mistake
careers

It seems that career may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
.
Thus
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, I
believed
Wrong verb form
believe

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb believed. Consider changing it.

show examples
one
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

’s decision to change solely depends on their own goals to be achieved.

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Introduction and Conclusion
The essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion which are essential for setting the context and summarizing the main points. It is important to frame your essay with these elements to guide the reader.
Supported Main Points
The main points need to be better supported with specific examples and explanations. Each paragraph should contain one clear idea that is expanded upon with evidence or examples.
Logical Structure
Organize the essay with clear logical connectors and transitions. Ensure that the essay is structured in a way that each paragraph flows naturally to the next.
Complete Response
Address all parts of the task to provide a complete response. Expand on the main reason for career changes and explain why your opinion is justified.
Clear and Comprehensive Ideas
Clarify your ideas for better comprehension. Your writing should be easily understood on first reading without confusion around the ideas presented.
Relevant Specific Examples
Include relevant and specific examples to support your arguments. Examples help to illustrate your point and provide a practical insight into the issues discussed.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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