Some people believe that we have too many choices. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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According to

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the human rights principle, every person is free to choose their options.

This

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freedom to determine what we want should be applied to a personal's life. Some people argue that we face abundant choices in our lives and it causes overwhelming.

However

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while

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I understand

this

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viewpoint, I strongly believe these various options,

although

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numerous, actually offer us important chances to grow personally and professionally. Starting with education, university students nowadays have a wide range of subjects to choose from, allowing them to tailor their studies to their interests and strengths.

This

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flexibility allows them not only to succeed in their chosen path but

also

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to diversify their skills.

This

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can be possible by taking some elective courses or even taking multiple online courses on the internet, and

this

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could enhance their resume and benefit them when seeking their future job.

For example

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, many fresh graduates who have other skill portfolios outside their initial field have a higher chance of being accepted by the best companies than other graduates with just a few skills. In the job market, there are undoubtedly many types of roles to choose from, and the fact that unlimited job openings out there might lead employees to career advancement opportunities.

For example

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due to

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the development of technology, there has been an increasing number of digital and remote jobs available,

such

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as digital marketers, virtual assistants, data scientists, and many others. Considering work in those high-paid works in digital industries rather than traditional types of jobs might accelerate personal income and promotion into leadership positions.

In other words

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, employees could consider applying for different career alternatives to increase their chances of better employment. In conclusion,

although

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I believe that there are too many preferences out there, from my perspective, the influence of the options triggers better opportunities for individuals in both personal skills and career growth.

ru.kabiru.biruThu Dec 28 2023

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coherence cohesion

Ensure that the essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. The introduction should set out the topic and your position, the body paragraphs should support your argument with clear main ideas and examples, and the conclusion should summarize your points and restate your position. You have done well with structure, but there is room for improvement in signposting and transitions between ideas.

task achievement

Fully develop your ideas to directly address the question posed. Each body paragraph should explore a specific facet of the argument and be linked clearly to the thesis statement. Support your arguments with specific examples, and ensure that these are fully explained and relevant to the topic. While your essay does address the task, further development and explanation could enhance the response.

10
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

312 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

overwhelmed
decision fatigue
paralysis by analysis
consumerism
globalization
personal autonomy
market saturation
option overload
decision-making process
psychological well-being
buyer's remorse
customization
trade-offs
minimalism
information superhighway

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