Vaccinating children against preventing diseases is not only unnecessary but also dangerous to waht extend do you agree or disagree?

The vaccination
Correct article usage
Vaccination
show examples
is widely used to prevent
diseases
among
population
Add an article
the population
show examples
in the
world
and it is some kind of better way to address
the
Correct article usage
apply
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dangerous
diseases
. Children are
the
Correct article usage
apply
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one of the key
category
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categories
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that is
going to be
thretened
Correct your spelling
threatened
by
diseases
because
Add the preposition
because of
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the lack of
immune
Correct article usage
an immune
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system. The argument of vaccinating kids to prevent
diseases
is mostly valuable in the modern
world
to avert
unkown
Correct your spelling
unknown
viruses rapidly. So, I completely disagree with
this
development because it is the only way to prevent
illnessess
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illnesses
.
Firstly
, vaccinating is necessary among
young
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the young
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generation and it is one of the effective
way
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ways
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to address
specilal
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special
infections.
Nowadys
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Nowadays
, it can be seen
variuos
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various
types of infections
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
are caused by germs
specially
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especially
show examples
viruses which cannot be prevented only by their
self immune
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self-immune
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system.
Therefore
they must be vaccinated to enhance
thier
Correct your spelling
their
immune to fight against dangerous viruses.
For example
, inactivated poliovirus vaccine shots are given at age 2 months which has become the most successful project around the
world
.
Therefore
, it is
neccessary
Correct your spelling
necessary
to
getting
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get
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vaccinated to prevent
such
kind
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kinds
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of threats in the future and I completely disagree
that
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with
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the argument.
On the other hand
, people are
telling
Verb problem
saying
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that vaccination is very harmful for children because
thay
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they
are not
matured
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mature
show examples
enough to
taking
Wrong verb form
take
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jabs. The vaccines are
Correct article usage
the results
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results
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result
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of
majority
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the majority
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of
researches
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research
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from experts in the
world
and most of the time they come up with better results
and
Correct word choice
apply
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those
Correct pronoun usage
that
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are validated and approved by the WHO.
Moreover
, death rates after being vaccinated
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
very low compared to numbers without being vaccinated.
For instance
,
majority
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the majority
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of
third
Add a hyphen
third-world
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world
countries
are suffered
Wrong verb form
suffer
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by
Change preposition
from
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various infections
due to
avoiding vaccines.
However
, vaccination is not harmful for children when considering dangerous
diseases
. In conclusion,
vaccinating
Replace the word
vaccination
show examples
is very valuable for kids to maximise their immune system to attack
diseases
in the modern
world
effectively and it will not be
a
Change the article
apply
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dangerous as they are approved by WHO which
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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used to
lowering
Wrong verb form
lower
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the number of deaths.
Submitted by Praslah on

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coherence cohesion
There are several issues in the logical structure of the essay. While the introduction offers a clear stance, the body paragraphs could be better organized and signposting phrases or transitional expressions should be used to improve clarity and flow of arguments.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present but not fully developed. They do not adequately paraphrase the prompt or clearly summarize the main points made in the essay. More attention needs to be paid to framing the essay effectively.
coherence cohesion
Main points are touched upon but are not sufficiently expanded with supporting arguments or detailed explanations. Ensuring each paragraph explores an idea thoroughly would strengthen the essay.
task achievement
While the response attempts to address the prompt, it fails to fully respond to all parts of the task. The position is stated, but the reasons for disagreement need more development and clearer exposition. Acknowledging the opposing view more thoroughly would improve the completeness of the response.
task achievement
Ideas are often simply stated rather than explained and developed comprehensively. Each idea presented requires further elaboration and support to demonstrate a deeper understanding of the topic.
task achievement
While examples are provided, they could be more relevant and specific to the argument being made. Include concrete examples or data to fortify your viewpoints and lend them legitimacy.
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