Despite health warnings, a large number of people continue to smoke all over the world. Why should we be concerned about this? What solutions would you suggest?

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There is no doubt these days that the percentage of smokers has increased over the years,

although

Linking Words

the

world

Correct your spelling

World Health Organization

show examples

health

Use synonyms

organization has tried to overcome

this

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dilemma. The question is, will

this

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phenomenon continue to grow even though

people

Use synonyms

are aware of it? In

this

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paper, I going to discuss how cigarettes can affect our

health

Use synonyms

and what are the tackles . In terms of problems, smoking can lead to a lot of

health

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issues for smokers and non-smokers

people

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. The main reason provided to support

this

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claim, one cigar has been burnt rich in carbon dioxide that causes multiple diseases with constant usage.

For example

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, diseases related to the immune system, and different kinds of cancers that will have progressed by the end, and

finally

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death.

Furthermore

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, sitting in the same place where there is a smoker, might exhibit

health

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problems,

although

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you are not a smoker.

moreover

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, on the same page , there are some potential solutions to promote

people

Use synonyms

's physical condition.

Firstly

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, raise the consciousness of society about the consequences of being a

smoke r

Correct your spelling

smoker

show examples

In other words

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, the government should take strict action by making suitable places to encourage them to stop

this

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habit.

Secondly

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, increase the price of tobacco around the world and aware them to don't

sell

Wrong verb form

selling

show examples

it to a person who

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

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under twenty years

Correct word choice

old.

show examples

the

Correct article usage

show examples

nutshell, smoking is an international issue cause an impact on

people

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health

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. All the countries have to take a serious move to solve

this

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problem and prevent the deterioration of the future

dentdent4Sat Dec 30 2023

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task achievement

In terms of task achievement, the essay generally addresses the topic, but the response could be more fully developed to meet the task requirements. It should provide a more detailed exploration of why the issue of smoking is of concern and expand on the suggested solutions with clearer examples or evidence. Furthermore, the response must be more direct in addressing the exact reasons we should be concerned, as mentioned in the question prompt.

coherence cohesion

The coherence and cohesion of the essay suffer due to a lack of clear logical progression and appropriate use of cohesive devices. The writer should focus on structuring the essay with clear paragraphs, each introducing a distinct idea, and using cohesive devices such as 'Firstly', 'Moreover', and 'In conclusion' correctly. Additionally, the conclusion should be a summary of the main points made within the essay, reflecting on the introduction and the topic sentences of the body paragraphs. There is also a need for correct punctuation and paragraph division to enhance readability.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

258 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Addiction
Cardiovascular disease
Chronic obstructive pulmonary disease (COPD)
Nicotine
Public health initiative
Secondhand smoke
Substance abuse
Tobacco cessation
Environmental degradation
Social norms
Healthcare burden
Preventive measures

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Despite health warnings, a large number of people continue to smoke all over the world. Why should we be concerned about this? What solutions would you suggest?

Some people believe that when deciding how taxpayers' money is spent, governments should prioritise health care, while others believe that there are other priorities to spend this money.Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think that the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages ? Give reasons for your answer and include relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Advertising has become an unavoidable part of everyone’s life. Some say that advertising is a positive part of our lives while others say it is a negative one. Discuss both views and include your own opinion.

Some people think that the main purpose of school and university education should be to prepare people for work. Others, however, think that the true role of education is to make us better citizens. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people say that the prevention of health problems is more important than the treatment of illness and disease and that Government funding should reflect this?What is your opinion?