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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some experts believe that when a country is already rich, any additional increase in economic wealth does not make its citizens any more satisfied. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#experts #country #wealth #citizens
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In evaluating whether a surge in economic wealth in affluent countries directly correlates with heightened citizen
satisfaction
, I tend to disagree with the notion that additional economic prosperity fails to enhance the contentment of the populace.
While
 it's argued that increased economic wealth in already affluent nations doesn't significantly impact citizen
satisfaction
, I contend that
such
growth
 does play a pivotal role in improving the
overall
 well-being and happiness of individuals.
Firstly
, heightened economic prosperity often leads to an augmented quality of life for
citizens
. It provides better access to essential services like healthcare, education, and infrastructure, which are integral to improving the living standards of the population.
Moreover
, economic
growth
 in affluent countries can facilitate greater employment opportunities and higher incomes for individuals. A thriving economy fosters innovation and job creation,
subsequently
 improving
citizens
' financial security and providing them with a sense of stability and
satisfaction
.
Additionally
, economic
growth
 enables societies to invest in technological advancements and infrastructure, resulting in increased convenience and efficiency in daily life. Advancements in technology often lead to improvements in various aspects of life, from communication to transportation, contributing to
citizens
' convenience and
overall
satisfaction
.
Furthermore
, a prosperous economy empowers governments to address societal challenges and invest in social welfare programs. These initiatives assist marginalized communities, reduce inequality, and promote social cohesion, crucial elements that contribute to
citizens
' contentment and happiness. In conclusion,
while
 some argue that increased economic wealth in affluent nations doesn't necessarily elevate citizen
satisfaction
, I firmly believe that economic
growth
 significantly contributes to improving living standards, providing opportunities, fostering innovation, and addressing social issues.
Hence
, continued economic progress remains instrumental in enhancing the
overall
satisfaction
 and well-being of
citizens
 in wealthy countries.
Submitted by vinape on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that the essay has a clear logical structure throughout. Use clear topic sentences to start each paragraph and make clear connections between each idea and for the overall argument.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present, setting and summarizing the argument effectively. Make sure the conclusion does not introduce new points and closely reflects the views presented.
coherence cohesion
Support main points with specific and varied examples or evidence. Each body paragraph should center around one main idea and provide clear, relevant support.
task achievement
Fully address the task by clearly responding to the question throughout the essay, and making sure to keep the response relevant to the question asked.
task achievement
Develop ideas comprehensively, with clear explanations of how they relate to the main topic. Ensure the clarity of argument so the reader does not need to infer any meanings.
task achievement
Include more relevant, specific examples to support the points made. Specificity will add depth to the argument and make it more convincing.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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