IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3.5

People should only concentrate on a single skill for life because it is the best way to succeed. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#people #skill #life
There is no denying the fact that people try their best to achieve success.
While
 there is a commonly held belief that concentrating on a specific clout is the greatest way to succeed, there is
also
 an argument that opposes it. In my opinion, I consider that to be a successful person you should play many roles and have a lot of
skills
.
To begin
 with, concentrating on one savvy
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
 you have a minor impact.
In other words
, day by day world is in development and computers may kill some jobs like translation and writing.
In addition
, even sports include many
skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
show examples
.
For example
, football players should know a lot of
skills
 to be undefinable
such
 as shooting, passing and tackling. Another point to consider focusing on a single know-how could make your opportunities limited. It is
also
 possible to say that some jobs require more than one language or other
skills
.
Moreover
, nowadays it is
easy
Replace the word
easier
show examples
 to learn more than
accomplishment
Replace the word
accomplish
show examples
.
For instance
, the internet gives us various resources to learn from them. In conclusion, despite people having different views. I believe that having diversity
skills
 increases your opportunity to get an excellent job.
Submitted by abdullmajeedsugati on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea, directly supporting your overall position. Use cohesive devices to logically connect sentences and paragraphs but take care not to overuse them. Aim for variety in your sentence structures for greater clarity.
task achievement
Carefully address all parts of the task, ensuring a full response to the prompt. Develop your position with specific, detailed examples, and precisely demonstrate how these examples support your point of view. Maintain focus on the question throughout the essay.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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