Some people think that schools should involve students in school management. Do you agree or disagree with this idea, give reasons and examples supporting your answers

#people #schools #students #school #management #idea #answers

this

time of the globe, the main educational

system

school

.For decades of time,in

schools

, there

are

Wrong verb form

has been

show examples

system

of boards that manage the

school

.Some people believe that

schools

should get

pupils

management

.In

this

Correct determiner usage

the

show examples

below

paragaphs

Correct your spelling

paragraphs

paragraph

, I will discuss reasons before it

is coming

Wrong verb form

comes

show examples

to a conclusion. On the one hand,It might be beneficial to involve

students

Change preposition

show examples

management

due to

a vast number of reasons.First and foremost,Only

pupils

are aware of their

school

's needs and

wants

Change the verb form

want

show examples

students

Change noun form

students'

student's

show examples

prespectative

Correct your spelling

perspective

and some

students

are dramatically shy to expand their thoughts to the

school

board or to the top heads who manage their

school

For example

in 2007 St'jhone's College's computer lab needed faster and new technological laptops and other electric items,Hovever

due to

students

' shyness and lack of communication the lab remained as it was till 2008.

Moreover

based on

this

senarrio

Correct your spelling

scenario

students

involved in

management

Correct article usage

the management

show examples

system

can

lead

Verb problem

have

show examples

to good understanding and communication with

schools

and

pupils

On the other hand

, adding

pupils

into

school

management

can make

enormous

Add an article

an enormous

show examples

difference as well.

Firstly

,It can be challenging for

pupils

' educational

system

due to

lack of time for studies.

Furthermore

,inviting

students

into the

management

system

can cause a lack of respect for

school

rules and regulations because

pupils

have already become the

pst

Correct your spelling

past

show examples

of it.

Lastly

,The majority of

schools

are to provide education on managing skills.

To sum

Add a comma

up,

show examples

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

my opinion,I strongly believe that

schools

restrict rules and run them by the

school

However

, to improve

students

management

skills,

schools

can provide limited managing parts to

pupils

Submitted by nipunhasmitha97 on Mon Jan 01 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

The essay shows an understanding of the topic and attempts to cover both sides; however, the development of ideas is only partially effective. Specific examples are used, but they are not fully expanded or convincing. Task response can be improved by delving deeper into how student involvement in management could work and its potential impacts on school dynamics and learning outcomes. Including more detailed examples and explaining the reasoning behind them will strengthen the argument and provide a more complete response.

coherence cohesion

The structure of the essay shows that an introduction and conclusion are present, and there is an attempt to organize the main points in a logical way. However, transitions between points can be smoother, and there is a need for better topic sentence formation. The essay could benefit from clearer paragraphing where each paragraph focuses on one clear idea, supported by cohesive devices to enhance the logical flow of information.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

252 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?
Nowadays, it is a common belief that buying an accommodation is more crucial than renting one. From my perspective, this is a negative circumstance that can lead to severe consequences in the future.
8
band
Some people who have been in prison become good citizens later, and it is often argued that these are the best people to talk to teenagers about the dangers of committing a crime. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It is true that ex-prisoners can become normal, productive members of society. I completely agree with the idea that allowing such people to speak to teenagers about their experiences is the best way to discourage them from breaking the law.
5
band
In the past, most people spent their entire career working for one company, whereas people nowadays move from one job to another. What are the advantages and disadvantages of each? Which do you think is better? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.
In the ancient period , some masses spent their entire time on one buisness however other people believe that recently folks have moved from one job into others. In this essay, I completely agree that if individuals stay time on one company such as increasing increment, working experience moreover,the biggest disadvantages is that same payment in an every year.
6
band
Some people think that social networking sites have a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays, the internet plays a crucial role in everyone's life and few individuals believe that it has adverse side effects on the population.This essay will discuss the reasons for my disagreement.
5.5
band
Some people believe that studying at university or college is the best route to a successful career, while others believe that it is better to get a job straight after school. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
It is often believed that those who complete higher education find the path to a bright career, however few supports the view to get job immediately after passing school. In my opinion, I strongly agree that finishing studies at university is much more beneficial in the long term.

Some people think that schools should involve students in school management. Do you agree or disagree with this idea, give reasons and examples supporting your answers

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

Some people who have been in prison become good citizens later, and it is often argued that these are the best people to talk to teenagers about the dangers of committing a crime. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that social networking sites have a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that studying at university or college is the best route to a successful career, while others believe that it is better to get a job straight after school. Discuss both views and give your opinion.