Some people think that the best way to improve road safety is to increase the minimum legal age for driving a car or motorbike. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In the contemporary epoch, the number of
road
accidents is growing rapidly.
Hence
, sparked a debate where some individuals believe that the legal
age
should be higher to drive any vehicle. I strongly disagree with the statement and will discuss its justification in upcoming paragraphs.
To begin
with,
age
is not the major concern with
road
safety
. There are many experiments and reports published in international journals state that a person at
age
Correct article usage
the age
show examples
of eighteen years is capable enough to understand all the driving aspects and its laws.
For instance
, a study from the University of California in 2021 reports that more accidents were reported with the
age
above thirty.
Moreover
, it has been seen that the son drives better than his parents.
This
clearly shows that people aged
age
18 to 30 have lower accidental concerns.
Hence
,
road
safety
issues are not relevant to
age
rather there can be some other issues that may require fixing to improve
road
safety
.
Furthermore
, not only
age
, bad infrastructure can be the real cause and should be fixed to improve
road
safety
. Most of the roads have huge potholes where people suffer from daily accidents and these cases are not registered under any laws.
For example
, yesterday, a person died by falling down in a pothole filled with rain water
while
travelling on his bike.
Moreover
,
this
is ubiquitous and can be seen in every part of our country.
Therefore
, the infrastructure is another important aspect that the government should improve in order to upgrade
road
safety
.
Thus
compared to
age
, there are many other factors which should be considered.
To conclude
, I would like to assert that,
age
is already suitable as per the current law to drive a car or bike
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and to improve
road
safety
. There are many other factors to consider specifically the infrastructure.
Submitted by hiteshpaul on

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task response
Ensure clarity when introducing your main argument. The introduction of your essay should clearly state your position on the matter, acknowledging the counterargument briefly if necessary. This sharpens the focus for your readers.
task response
Support your points with specific, relevant examples. General statements can be strengthened by using concrete illustrations or data, which would also enhance your argument's persuasiveness.
coherence and cohesion
Use a variety of cohesive devices to enhance logical flow. While your essay exhibits a clear structure, a wider range of linking words and phrases could benefit coherence.
coherence and cohesion
Avoid overly complex sentence structures that may detract from the clarity of your argument. Aim for a balance between complex and simple sentences to maintain readability.
coherence and cohesion
Be mindful of punctuation and sentence separation to avoid run-on sentences, as these can impact the reader's comprehension.

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