IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows the figures for imprisonment in five countries between 1930 and 1980

The given bar chart provides information about the number of imprisonment in 5 different ( Great Britain, Australia, New Zealand, United
State
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States
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,
Canada
Correct word choice
and Canada
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) countries from 1930 to 1980.
Overall
Linking Words
, the maximum number of
imprisonment
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imprisoned
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were
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was
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 in
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
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,
at the end
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 of
period
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the period
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,
whereas
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 the lowest
in
Add a missing verb
was in
show examples
 Australia throughout the given time.
Although
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 every
regions
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region
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experinced fluctuatons
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experienced fluctuations
 over the period.
Initially
Linking Words
, the
impriosonment
Correct your spelling
improvement
 depicted in
chart
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the chart
a chart
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 for Great
Brtitain
Correct your spelling
Britain
 was about 30. But during the
trend
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trend,
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 Uk witnessed
Correct article usage
a gradually
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gradually increased
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gradual increase
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 in
theri
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their
 numbers.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, Australia's
fiigure
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figure
 was roughly 70 at the
begining
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beginning
 of the calculations,
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however
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however,
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 it demonstrated
decreased
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a decreased
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 trend in the year 1980, around 55%,
made
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making
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 it
lowest
Correct article usage
the lowest
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 amongst the countries.
In contrast
Linking Words
 with Canada,
firstly
Linking Words
 it accounted for 120 but
it is clear that
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,
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apply
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 it
also
Linking Words
potrayed
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portrayed
 declined trend.
According to
Linking Words
 the data, in 1930 New Zealand
responsible
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was responsible
show examples
 for 100, after that it came down nearly 55 in the year 1950,
then
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 again it
climed
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climbed
 up in the next three following year.
In addition
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,
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
 revealed the
punisment
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punishment
 count was 100 but throughout the period it outraced
rest
Correct article usage
the rest
show examples
 of the countries.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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