it is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantage.? give reasons for your answer and include relevant examples.

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There is no denying the fact that taking
risks
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in our
lives
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by
people
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in some situations may result in huge success.
While
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it is a commonly held belief that humankind should take
risks
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in their professional and personal
lives
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, as; it is something crucial for individuals, there is
also
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an argument that opposes it. In my opinion, I consider that
people
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who are taking
risks
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gain more benefits than negative points.
To begin
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with, most individuals who take
risks
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become able to change their
lives
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radically.
In other words
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,
this
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type of person is ambitious and brave, so; they have the ability to overcome any difficulties, they may face on their way toward achieving their goals.
In addition
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, when
people
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make their decisions to defeat professional or personal obstacles,
this
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attitude will confer them a strong personality and enough experience to solve any problem in their
lives
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.
For example
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, Apple company took a risk when it distributed the iPhone in the market for the first time because there were many competitors, in 2010, but without taking
this
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risk how they have gotten the tremendous success that they have today? Another point to consider, when
people
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do not try to take any
risks
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in their
lives
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,
this
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behaviour will make them lazy. It is
also
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possible to say that without challenges humankind will not be able to accomplish any progress in
this
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world.
Moreover
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, overcoming
risks
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plays a significant role in the progress, of our modern era.
For instance
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, if scientists do not take the
risks
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of manufacturing aircraft to invade the sky, they will not be able to discover all planets in space. In conclusion, despite
people
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having different views, I believe that it is very important for individuals to try to take
risks
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in their life, as;
this
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concept will make them attain a huge experience, and
this
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is the key to development throughout human life on the earth.
Hence
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, generally, numerous pros will be obtained after overcoming challenges.

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coherence cohesion
The logical structure could benefit from clearer transitions and a more systematic progression of arguments. Even though the essay presents an introduction and conclusion, they need to be developed with stronger thesis statements and summarised key points. To enhance coherence and cohesion, it's important to link ideas smoothly, avoid repetition, and follow a logical sequence.
task achievement
Task achievement is quite good with a complete response to the prompt, but your ideas sometimes lack clarity and comprehensiveness. Consider expanding on your main points by providing in-depth analysis and a broader range of examples. The essay demonstrates some risk-related examples, yet they could be more varied and detailed. Adding counterarguments and addressing potential disadvantages before reaffirming your stance would strengthen your position and demonstrate a full understanding of the topic.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Opportunities
  • Growth
  • Innovation
  • Challenges
  • Self-discovery
  • Resilience
  • Uncertainty
  • Consequences
  • Calculated risks
  • Stagnation
  • Regret
  • Comfort zone
  • Entrepreneurship
  • Adventurous spirit
  • Thriving
  • Failure
  • Mitigate
  • Reap the rewards
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