it is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages? give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples.
There is no denying the fact that taking
risks
has a crucial role in our lives
, so; people have to adopt this
principle. While
it is a commonly held belief that more pros are associated with taking risks
, there is also
an argument that following
this
idea may result in negative points. This
essay will analyse this
topic from both points of view and express my opinion.
On one hand, some cons may happen as a result
of doing missions which contain dangerous factors, that can affect humans personally or professionally. In other words
, when a human fails to finish a task with some risks
, he may be depressed. In addition
, some people may suffer from job loss, hence
; their conditions become miserable because they cannot cover the cost of their living expenses. For example
, if somebody takes a huge loan from the bank to set up a project, but his project has failed, there will be a great probability for him to be in prison because he cannot return money back to the bank.
On the other hand
, tremendous pros can be accomplished after finishing risky tasks. It is also
possible to say that taking risks
is the key to development in our lives
, as; it always leads to great success. Moreover
, if humankind does not take any risk, our lives
will not be changed, no progress will be achieved in any field like technology, or transportation, and life will become dull. For instance
, when scientists took the risk of manufacturing aircraft, they became able to invade space.
In conclusion, there are no easy answers to this
question. On balance, however
, I tend to believe that taking risks
is so important and plays a significant role, as, our lives
will not be changed for the better without taking them in various aspects of life.Submitted by sm710129 on
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Coherence & Cohesion
When structuring your essay, ensure that your introduction clearly outlines what will be discussed, and each paragraph should flow logically to the next. The use of linking phrases could be improved to enhance readability and coherence.
Coherence & Cohesion
Each main body paragraph should clearly present a central idea, be well-supported with explanations or examples, and smoothly transition to the next point. Aim to expand on your examples to be more specific, as this will add depth to your arguments.
Task Achievement
Ensure that your essay fully addresses the prompt, providing a balanced view with relevant examples. While your conclusion summarises the arguments made, strive to restate your position more clearly and explain why the advantages outweigh the disadvantages, if that is your opinion.
Coherence & Cohesion
Your use of cohesive devices like 'On one hand,' 'On the other hand,' and 'In conclusion,' is good. However, within paragraphs, sentences could be better linked to each other, and ideas could be more cohesively ordered to improve the logical flow of information.
Task Achievement
Be careful to avoid overly general statements without concrete examples. To strengthen your Task Achievement, include specific and relevant examples to support your viewpoints. These examples should directly relate to and reinforce the argument you're making in each part of the essay.