There has been major advances in technology over the recent decades and this has led to significant improvements in people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In
this
modern era
too many Add a comma
era,
improvments
Correct your spelling
improvements
happend
in Correct your spelling
happened
happen
knowlge
, which Correct your spelling
knowledge
had
changed Wrong verb form
have
humans
Change the noun form
human
life
for ever
. As can be Correct your spelling
forever
seen
most of Add a comma
seen,
this
changes were some kind of developments, which Correct determiner usage
these
iproved
Correct your spelling
improved
proved
peoples
Change noun form
people's
life
and made living easier than past. In next
two Correct article usage
the next
Correct your spelling
paragraphs
pragraphs
I will write about the goodness of Add a comma
pragraphs,
this
action then
I will show my final opinion as conclusion
.
Add an article
a conclusion
the conclusion
One
of the best things that happend
Correct your spelling
happened
by
Change preposition
with
advacments
in Correct your spelling
advancements
sicene
was Correct your spelling
science
Correct article usage
the evelution
evelution
of Correct your spelling
evolution
evaluation
trasportation
. Correct your spelling
transportation
This
new technology
changed people's life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
posetively
. Correct your spelling
positively
For example
, in 1900 if some
Correct your spelling
someone
one
wanted to go to the
another city he had to walk or ride a horse and Remove the article
apply
this
cycle may took
3 months of his Change the verb form
take
life
, but today if another person wants to travel between cities he can use train
which is faster and Correct article usage
a train
cheeper
. I can see thatCorrect your spelling
cheaper
,
Remove the comma
apply
this
new invention
made good changes for humanity and because of that trasportation
became faster and easier.
Another good change which Correct your spelling
transportation
happend
Correct your spelling
happened
by
Change preposition
with
improvment
in Correct your spelling
improvement
the
Correct article usage
apply
knowlge
and Correct your spelling
knowledge
had
changed Unnecessary verb
apply
every
Replace the word
everyone's
one
's life
for the best,
was Remove the comma
apply
invention
of the internet. Add an article
the invention
an invention
This
new technology
is humanty's
biggest Correct your spelling
humanity's
achivment
, which changed Correct your spelling
achievement
every
Replace the word
everyone's
one
's life
once for ever
. To give just a single example, I can just mention in the past when a person wanted to send a Correct your spelling
forever
massege
to Correct your spelling
message
some
Correct your spelling
someone
one
he had to pay for paper post and he had to write it, but right now that person has to use his phone type
what he Fix the infinitive
to type
want
Change the verb form
wants
then
just send it. This
is a huge evelution
for every single human. Correct your spelling
evolution
Invention
of the internet Add an article
The invention
had
changed all of Wrong verb form
has
lives
on Add an article
the lives
this
planet for ever
and for the Correct your spelling
forever
best
.
in conclusion in Replace the word
better
this
one
or two past decades technology
had
really gone far and Wrong verb form
has
this
advancment
made Correct your spelling
advancement
huge
difference in Add an article
a huge
peoples
Change noun form
people's
lifes
. Correct your spelling
lives
on
my opinion Change the preposition
in
this
action had best
results Correct article usage
the best
such
as faster and chiper
transportation and more important than that the internet came to be, Correct your spelling
cheaper
chipper
this
massive invention
made society's life
really easy. To be honest this
advancment
is not always good like when Correct your spelling
advancement
countrys
produce Correct your spelling
countries
country's
danger
weapens Replace the word
dangerous
such
as the
atomic bombs which can kill Correct article usage
apply
to
many people Replace the word
too
by
Change preposition
with
one
click, If i
had power I would Change the capitalization
I
disapear
Correct your spelling
disappear
this
bad side of the
Correct article usage
apply
technology
. After all
advancement is Add a comma
all,
really
important and good thing to happen for Add an article
a really
evey
single Correct your spelling
every
of
Change preposition
apply
Nations
.Fix the agreement mistake
Nation
Submitted by mohamad.tavalari2008 on
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coherence cohesion
The essay lacks clear and coherent structure. It is important to have a clear thesis statement in your introduction and topic sentences for each paragraph that directly address the essay question. Make sure to organize your essay into clear paragraphs, each with a single main idea that is expanded upon with supporting sentences.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present but they need to be more developed. The introduction should clearly state your position on the topic, and the conclusion should succinctly summarize your main points and restate your position.
coherence cohesion
There is an attempt to support main points with examples, but they need to be more specific and directly relevant to the question. Studies, statistics, or more detailed hypothetical scenarios will strengthen your argument.
task achievement
The response is somewhat complete but the ideas presented are not always clear or comprehensive. Ensure that you fully address the task by presenting your viewpoint on the extent to which you agree or disagree, and by discussing both sides of the argument if appropriate.
task achievement
The essay drifts into general statements without fully explaining or elaborating on ideas. Aim to clearly articulate your ideas and explore them in depth to demonstrate a thorough understanding of the topic.
task achievement
The examples provided are not always relevant or specific enough to the topic. Make sure to include examples that directly support your position and show a clear link to the argument you are making.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite
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