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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people think that, robots will replace teachers in the class room. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #robots #teachers #class #room
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The Past few years have seen a dramatic increase in reliance on
robots
,
due to
 the massive improvement of artificial intelligence, which in turn, has led to the disappearance of some professions.
That is
 why some people believe that
robots
 may replace
teachers
, and I completely disagree with
this
. Because generally, these machines lack the ability to feel anything,
additionally
, teaching is an interactive process.
Firstly
, one point
which
Correct word choice
that
show examples
 I believe to be absolutely pivotal is that
robots
 are devoid of any feelings, a figure that prevents them from being tutors. To illustrate,
teachers
 are usually empathic, so they may forgive some mistakes.
For instance
, if a student
was
Wrong verb form
is
show examples
 sick, the teacher might excuse him for being late. So
it is clear that
teachers
 are better than
robots
 that cannot replace them.
Secondly
, another point which can be easily seen by everyone is that teaching needs interaction between two sides, a process which is completely absent in the case of the robot.
In other words
, discussion is a crucial part of education,
thus
, it is recommended ,for
teachers
, to ask their students about the topics they are explaining and discuss every single subject with them.
As
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
Studies have shown that, schools which adopted an interactive approach
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
education, are much higher than other schools in the percentage of students’
IQ
Fix the agreement mistake
IQs
show examples
. So
it is clear that
teachers
 are better than those machines in the field of education, as they can properly communicate and effectively interact with students. To recapitulate, the perception that
robots
 may take the role of
teachers
, from my perspective, is completely flawed
due to
 the fact that, they lack both feelings and interaction.
Submitted by moo.elnokrashy on

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coherence cohesion
In your essay, it is crucial to ensure that your ideas are clearly presented and logically structured. Avoid presenting a list of ideas without fully developing them or linking them together coherently. Instead, focus on expanding each point with relevant details and examples, and use a variety of linking words and phrases to connect your ideas more effectively.
coherence cohesion
Your essay needs a clear introduction and conclusion to frame your argument. The introduction should outline the main points you will discuss, and the conclusion should summarize your argument and restate your opinion. This gives your essay a satisfactory closure and reinforces the points made within the essay.
task achievement
To improve in task achievement, make sure that your response fully addresses all parts of the prompt. This includes forming a clear opinion and discussing it throughout the essay without going off-topic. Use specific examples to support your claims, making your ideas comprehensive and persuasive.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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