In some countries university students live at home with their family while they study, whereas in other countries students attend university in another city. Do you think the benefits of living away from home during university outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Issues surrounding long-distance relationships are a frequent topic of discussion in contemporary society. It is increasingly common for individuals to opt for living close to their parents
while
Linking Words
studying rather than staying out of their hometown.
While
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
trend offers certain advantages, I contend that the drawbacks are equally equal to the benefits.
This
Linking Words
essay will provide
further
Linking Words
explanations and examples to support my viewpoint. On the one hand, living near one's city presents several benefits.
In other words
Linking Words
, it primarily affords convenience, facilitating comfortableness.
For instance
Linking Words
, they can easily ask their families or friends for lesson guidance and
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
not be disturbed by roommates since sleeping in their own estate.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
helps students save the enormous costs of living
such
Linking Words
as renting, utility costs and transportation fees.
Finally
Linking Words
but not least, it is important for them to spend savings budgets on relaxation activities and investments.
Conversely
Linking Words
, the decision to
pursuing
Wrong verb form
pursue
show examples
a master's degree in other countries or cities
also
Linking Words
carries significant advantages. To explain, chief among these is expanding
wide
Correct article usage
a wide
show examples
range of knowledge stemming from the adventure overseas.
This
Linking Words
lifestyle may lead to the understanding of cultural diversity and
receiving
Verb problem
apply
show examples
survival abilities.
For example
Linking Words
, growing connections globally can enhance your career path or facing unpredictable problems yourself helps you become stronger. In conclusion,
while
Linking Words
the advantages of staying near hometown communities are notable, the adverse effects of studying abroad are
also
Linking Words
equal to these benefits. It is
therefore
Linking Words
imperative for individuals to meticulously assess their personal circumstances before making
such
Linking Words
a pivotal determination.
Submitted by nyentdn on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Your introduction could be more directly related to the topic of living at home versus studying in another city. Try to clearly state your position on whether the benefits of living away outweigh the disadvantages.
coherence cohesion
While you present both sides of the argument, ensure your essay consistently supports a single point of view. This will help solidify your argument and improve the coherence.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which help provide a good structure.
task achievement
The essay addresses the question and discusses both the advantages and disadvantages of living away from home during university.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • independence
  • self-reliance
  • finance management
  • exposure
  • broaden horizons
  • open-minded
  • adaptability
  • conducive environment
  • isolation
  • homesickness
  • financial burden
  • household duties
  • academic responsibilities
  • personal growth
What to do next:
Look at other essays: