In some countries university students live at home with their family while they study, whereas in other countries students attend university in another city. Do you think the benefits of living away from home during university outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience.

#countries #university #students #home #study #city

Issues surrounding long-distance relationships are a frequent topic of discussion in contemporary society. It is increasingly common for individuals to opt for living close to their parents

while

studying rather than staying out of their hometown.

While

this

trend offers certain advantages, I contend that the drawbacks are equally equal to the benefits.

This

essay will provide

further

explanations and examples to support my viewpoint. On the one hand, living near one's city presents several benefits.

In other words

, it primarily affords convenience, facilitating comfortableness.

For instance

, they can easily ask their families or friends for lesson guidance and

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

not be disturbed by roommates since sleeping in their own estate.

Moreover

this

helps students save the enormous costs of living

such

as renting, utility costs and transportation fees.

Finally

but not least, it is important for them to spend savings budgets on relaxation activities and investments.

Conversely

, the decision to

pursuing

Wrong verb form

pursue

show examples

a master's degree in other countries or cities

also

carries significant advantages. To explain, chief among these is expanding

wide

Correct article usage

a wide

show examples

range of knowledge stemming from the adventure overseas.

This

lifestyle may lead to the understanding of cultural diversity and

receiving

Verb problem

apply

show examples

survival abilities.

For example

, growing connections globally can enhance your career path or facing unpredictable problems yourself helps you become stronger. In conclusion,

while

the advantages of staying near hometown communities are notable, the adverse effects of studying abroad are

also

equal to these benefits. It is

therefore

imperative for individuals to meticulously assess their personal circumstances before making

such

a pivotal determination.

Submitted by nyentdn on Tue Jul 02 2024

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task achievement

Your introduction could be more directly related to the topic of living at home versus studying in another city. Try to clearly state your position on whether the benefits of living away outweigh the disadvantages.

coherence cohesion

While you present both sides of the argument, ensure your essay consistently supports a single point of view. This will help solidify your argument and improve the coherence.

coherence cohesion

You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which help provide a good structure.

task achievement

The essay addresses the question and discusses both the advantages and disadvantages of living away from home during university.

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

255 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

independence
self-reliance
finance management
exposure
broaden horizons
open-minded
adaptability
conducive environment
isolation
homesickness
financial burden
household duties
academic responsibilities
personal growth

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In the past, knowledge is contained in books. Nowadays, knowledge is uploaded to the internet. Do the adventages of this outweigh the disadventages.

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