IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Some people think that we should divide students based on their academic ability, while others think we should educate all students together. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #students #ability
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There are some who believe we should separate
students
Use synonyms
according to
Linking Words
 their academic ability,
while
Linking Words
 others consider we need to teach all
students
Use synonyms
 together. In my opinion, it is beneficial to educate
students
Use synonyms
 together,
however
Linking Words
Add a comma
,
show examples
I agree we really need to separate
students
Use synonyms
' classes based on their academic ability. Because
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
it will help them
according to
Linking Words
 what they need and
also
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 it makes them improve their ability.
Students
Use synonyms
 getting along together is good to teach them how to communicate and interact with each other. Communication will impact their behavior and
also
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 social skills
so
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 encourages them to become leaders or members .
However
Linking Words
,
students
Use synonyms
 have different needs for their education.
Eventually
Add a comma
Eventually,
show examples
 schools would need to set up curriculum
according to
Linking Words
 what they need.
For example
Linking Words
, there are
students
Use synonyms
have
Correct pronoun usage
who have
show examples
receive
Change the verb form
received
show examples
subject
Fix the agreement mistake
subjects
show examples
 in school just about 50% but their friends have received 100%.
Consequently
Linking Words
, it does not balance and could affect how the class improves. because half of the class is already to the new subject but the others have to adapt slowly
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the class. In conclusion, There are advantages to encouraging our
students
Use synonyms
 together but I agree
students
Use synonyms
 have different needs so we should put them
according to
Linking Words
 what they need.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

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Introduction and Conclusion
Ensure that the essay has a clear introduction and conclusion that effectively summarize the main points and the writer's opinion. The introduction should clearly state the topic and the writer's standpoint, while the conclusion should succinctly wrap up the arguments made.
Supporting Main Points
Develop your main points more fully with additional supporting information or examples. Ideas could be expanded with more depth or detail, which would enhance the overall argument and provide a more persuasive narrative.
Logical Structure
Strive for a more coherent essay structure where ideas flow logically from one to another. Transitions between paragraphs could be smoother, and ideas within paragraphs should be more tightly connected to ensure the reader can follow your arguments without effort.
Complete Response
Remember to directly answer all parts of the question. Your essay should respond to the prompt in its entirety, covering all views and giving your own opinion with clear reasons and examples.
Clear Comprehensive Ideas
The essay would benefit from clear organization of ideas and comprehensive development of arguments. Presenting clear, comprehensive ideas is crucial to achieving higher scores on the IELTS exam.
Relevant Specific Examples
Provide more specific, relevant examples to strengthen your arguments. Use examples from a range of sources or experiences to support your points and provide a firm grounding for your opinions, thereby enhancing the overall impact of the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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