IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

Last month you had a holiday overseas where you stayed with some friends. They have just sent you some photos of your holiday. Write a letter to your friends. In your letter, thank them for the photos and the holiday explain why you didn't write earlier invite them to come and stay with you

#month #holiday #friends #photos
Dear Lucy and Mark My dear friend many thanks for the
time
 that you
are spend
Wrong verb form
spent
show examples
 with me
in
Change preposition
on
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 holiday, I
had
Wrong verb form
have
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 got the photos, the photos that you
send
Wrong verb form
sent
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 me
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 fantastic. The place that we visited was
a
Change the article
apply
show examples
wonderful,you
now
Correct your spelling
know
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, and I'm glad that I
have
Wrong verb form
had
show examples
 been
great
Change the article
a great
show examples
time
 with both of you, I'll never forget the
time
 that we
spend
Wrong verb form
spent
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 together. Excuse me, I
don't
Verb problem
haven't
show examples
write
Wrong verb form
written
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 to you thank you for the photos,
thought
Correct your spelling
though
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 I
get
Wrong verb form
got
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 home
long
Add an article
a long
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time
 ago, I had a problem with my health but now I feel
myself
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
better than yesterday don't worry about me . I would like to invite both of you to my lovely city .My city is wonderful with many sights ,there
a
Add a missing verb
are a
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lot of shops restaurants and bars to have a good
time
 and rest with
we
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
my dear friend and
also
 I have my wedding with my dear friend , I am sure that we will enjoy
time
 here, I would love to see you both soon take care and write back Looking forward to seeing you soon Warm wishes Bakhshandabonu
Submitted by ina1_95 on

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greeting and closing
Begin your letter with appropriate salutations such as 'Dear Lucy and Mark,' to establish a clear and respectful greeting.
single idea per paragraph
Ensure each paragraph focuses on a single idea to improve readability and organization. For example, one paragraph can be dedicated to thanking your friends, another for explaining the delay in writing, and a third for the invitation.
logical structure
Maintain a logical flow of ideas where each paragraph naturally leads to the next, creating a progression from gratitude to explanation to invitation.
complete response
Address all prompts given in the task effectively. Thank them properly, provide a clear reason for not writing sooner, and extend a heartfelt invitation to stay.
suitable writing tone
Use a friendly and warm tone throughout the letter to reflect the nature of your relationship with your friends and to convey your message effectively. Avoid abrupt transitions and maintain a conversational style.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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