International air fares are falling and tourism is growing. What are the advantages and disadvantages of increasing tourism activity?
The past decades have seen a dramatic decrease in the price of going abroad.
As a result
, when the cost is affordable, more and more communities can travel overseas. It is argued that Linking Words
this
development can have some bad effects on the world. Linking Words
While
others contend that Linking Words
this
is beneficial for most public. Linking Words
While
there are certain drawbacks to the growth of tourism, I would contend that the upsides are more glaring.
On the one hand, the disadvantages need to be acknowledged. Linking Words
Firstly
, as more crowds visit the same place, it is sure that more trash will be dumped. Linking Words
Consequently
, the environment will be polluted and can even cause air pollution. Linking Words
For instance
, thousands of communities come to Times Square every day and there is a tremendous number of trash being dumped annually. Linking Words
Second,
another negative phenomenon is that the price of everything is climbing significantly, when a place is noted as a tourist city, it will attract more visitors to come. Linking Words
This
is a perfect chance for sellers to higher the cost to make more money. Linking Words
For example
, in my country, a coconut costs 30 USD in the capital city but just costs 5 USD in my city.
Linking Words
On the other hand
, the merits pale in comparison with the demerits. Linking Words
First,
the development of tourism activity can help an attraction to have more income. When many people visit the same place, it will be famous and can attract more visitors to come. In my country, travelling helped us to earn about 20 million Viet Nam Dong in the Linking Words
last
year, to illustrate.
In conclusion, Linking Words
although
there are some disadvantages, the increase in tourism activity still has more benefits. I suggest that we should visit or travel ethically, we should not dump trash or destroy anything.Linking Words
Submitted by emonsunderland2015 on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Keep them distinct and well-structured. For this essay, the structure is there, but better transition between ideas and paragraphs would enhance understanding.
coherence cohesion
Develop your main points with more specific arguments and examples. Your writing occasionally presents general statements that lack in-depth analysis and detailed illustration.
task achievement
Expand upon the advantages and disadvantages more evenly to fully address the prompt. Balance between the two is crucial for a complete response.
task achievement
Use specific and precisely relevant examples to support your ideas. Some of the examples provided are not detailed enough and fail to fully demonstrate the point you are trying to make.
task achievement
Your ideas are somewhat clear but could be expressed more comprehensively. Make sure each paragraph elaborates on one main idea, and this idea is thoroughly explained.