Some people think that school should choose students according to their academic abilities, while others think it is better to have students of different abilities studying together. Discuss both views and state your own opinion.
In
this
present world, academic standings have become a crucial factor for schools. Even universities choose their candidates based on grades only. While
some individuals claim schools should opt for students
with high standings, others believe that pupils with different abilities
should not be separated. In the subsequent paragraphs, both views will be discussed, however
, In my opinion, separating students
with specific qualifications would be more beneficial.
To begin
with, educational institutions should have unique plans for children with high-standing abilities
. In this
way, their full potential and talents would be revealed. These students
can be taught more complex topics due to
their brain functionalities, resulting in bringing honour for themselves and their nations. For example
, they may be qualified to enter the international science olympiads and win multiple awards. By and large, paying attention to these types of students
can benefit both themselves and their country.
On the other hand
, studying all types of pupils together has its own advantages. In this
atmosphere, strong students
help weak ones to improve their scores. As a result
, this
can increase the knowledge, abilities
, and average grades of many students
, in addition
to their higher motivation in learning. Moreover
, in this
way, cultivating discrimination would be mitigated in society and all students
would be at the same level.
To sum up
, paying attention to all types of students
in school can not be denied as it motivates students
and prevents prevalence
of prejudice in society. Correct article usage
the prevalence
Nonetheless
, providing a special environment for students
with unique abilities
can bring more benefits for themselves and society. Thus
, separating these pupils from other classmates would be my opinion to have a prosperous nation.Submitted by Reza Moravej
on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that there is a clear logical sequence of ideas throughout the essay. While the essay does demonstrate a sequence, the transitions between the paragraphs and main ideas could be smoother to enhance the essay's overall flow.
coherence cohesion
Make sure to include both an introduction and a conclusion, which you have done. However, ensuring the conclusion more clearly summarizes the main points made in the essay could make it stronger.
coherence cohesion
The essay could benefit from slightly more developed examples or explanations that better support the main points. While examples are provided, delve deeper to add weight to your arguments.
task achievement
You have addressed the task well by discussing both views and providing your own opinion. Be cautious not to oversimplify complex ideas or views, especially in the conclusion.
task achievement
Your essay presents clear and comprehensive ideas. Nonetheless, working on the preciseness of your ideas and avoiding the excessive repetition of some notions will improve the clarity further.
task achievement
Include relevant and specific examples to illustrate your points. You've done this to an extent but broadening your range of examples will strengthen your arguments and provide a more detailed response to the prompt.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example