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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The chart shows the results of surveys in one African country asking teenagers the main reasons for using their phones between 2016 and 2019. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart shows the results of surveys in one African country asking teenagers the main reasons for using their phones between 2016 and 2019. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The pie charts illustrate the main purpose of teens in an African region to use gadgets from 2016 to 2019.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that social networks were dominant across the reasons,
while
Linking Words
 phone calls consistently used the lowest. Digital
camera
Fix the agreement mistake
cameras
show examples
also
Linking Words
 replaced
email
Use synonyms
's rank
at the end
Linking Words
 of the
period
Use synonyms
.
Initially
Linking Words
, social media
used
Add a missing verb
was used
show examples
 by 50% of teenagers, and has decreased to 48% in 2017. One year later, the number of users increased slightly by about 3%.
Then
Linking Words
, it continuously rose and became the highest level at 56% in 2019. During
the
Correct determiner usage
this
show examples
period
Use synonyms
,
email
Use synonyms
 has always decreased. It started with 25% of people using
email
Use synonyms
, but keep dropped from 2017 to 2019, with 24%, 20%, and 19%, respectively.
In contrast
Linking Words
, digital
camera
Fix the agreement mistake
cameras
show examples
 climbed marginally. It remained steady at 15% in 2016 and 2017,
then
Linking Words
 grew to 18% and into second place in 2019, taking over
email
Use synonyms
 position. The
last
Linking Words
 one was phone calls which had the lowest rates throughout the
period
Use synonyms
. In two years, between 2016 and 2018, the percentage of phone users was only around 10% to 13%.
However
Linking Words
, it has declined drastically to 5% in the
last
Linking Words
period
Use synonyms
.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words email, period with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
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