16.In some countries, there are not enough medical and educational facilities in rural areas. Some people believe newly graduated teachers and doctors should be sent to rural areas to work for some time, while others suggest that people should be free to choose a place to work. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In
this
present world, educational and medical infrastructures have not been provided in some rural areas. Some
people
believe freshly graduated doctors and teachers should serve for a period of time in these locations
while
others claim that every individual should have the right to choose their workplace. In my opinion,
people
with special qualifications should be sent to these areas to help,
however
, both views will be discussed in the subsequent paragraphs.
To begin
with, every person in a country should benefit from an educational system and
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
medical care. There should be no prejudice in providing these amenities between
people
in different areas. As hospitals and schools are considered vital infrastructures in a populated area, the government have to be responsible for providing these features
along with
their staff.
Otherwise
, the public may suffer from diseases, or children may be forced to travel to nearby cities for education.
On the other hand
, every graduated person should be able to choose their workplace. Depriving
people
of their basic rights can have serious consequences. To illustrate, forcing reluctant doctors to help villagers may result in misdiagnosis.
Moreover
, imagine a class which is managed by a boring teacher, resulting in demotivating kids.
Therefore
, if the basic rights of
people
in society are not given, it definitely leads to catastrophic impacts on society. In conclusion,
although
providing
people
with their right to opt for their favourable working place, individuals with special abilities like doctors and educators should be responsible for helping villagers in terms of medical care and education.
Submitted by Reza Moravej on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

introduction conclusion present
Make certain that your introduction clearly presents the topic and your thesis, explaining the purpose of the essay. The conclusion should effectively summarize your primary points and restate your position clearly to finish the argument.
logical structure
Ensure that ideas are logically organized and that paragraphs have clear central points. Use a range of linking words and phrases to connect ideas within and across paragraphs to improve the flow of the essay.
supported main points
Develop your main points with specific examples and detailed explanations, which help to elaborate your ideas and provide a convincing argument. Make sure these examples are directly relevant to the topic.
complete response
Fully address all parts of the task. The response should clearly present relevant ideas, making sure to discuss both points of view and your own opinion. Expand all the main points to sufficiently meet the requirements of the task.
clear comprehensive ideas
Present ideas that are clear, well thought out, and comprehensive. Ensure that you fully develop each idea and clearly communicate these to the reader.
relevant specific examples
Use specific examples to support your ideas, ensuring that they are directly tied to the topic and clearly illustrate your arguments. Embed these examples naturally into your discussion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: