It is better for the students to live away from the home during their university studies rather than staying with their parents. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
The topic of whether university
students
should stay in their family house
is debatable. While
some people believe that it is more beneficial to stay with their parents
, others argue it is unreasonable.
This
essay will elaborate on why students
should live away and not stay in their parents
' house
.
Parents
have always thought that their children should stay with them during their university studies.
They are justifiably worried about something that might occur to their children. For example
, they fear that their children might get sick because they think that they are not able to look as good as their parents
can. As a result
, parents
naturally think they should stay in a family house
. In addition
, staying in the family house
also
has benefits for the family economy. Renting a house
might be a huge burden for parents
because of its expense. As a consequence
of these reasons, many individuals think it is more advantageous for students
to stay with their families.
Despite the benefits, the idea that they should live away from home is more reasonable. First of all, college age is the crucial year for teenagers to learn how to survive without parents
. They need to become independent from their parents
and learn some essential skills
such
as making food and earning money. Furthermore
, these practical skills
contribute to character development. According to
a
recent research that has been done at Harvard University, the Remove the article
apply
students
who wouldn't learn basic skills
also
have the lowest rate of success in life. Overall
, the notion that students
should live in their parents
' house
is unnecessary; instead
, they should live independently to acquire essential life skills
.
This
essay argues that even though it might have benefits to live in parents'
Correct pronoun usage
your parents'
house
, it is clearly better to live away.Submitted by edzcls on
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coherence cohesion
It is essential to have a more clear and coherent structure to your essay. You should introduce your main points in the introduction, develop each one in its own paragraph with clear explanations and examples, and then summarize them in the conclusion. Each paragraph should have a clear topic sentence and the ideas should be logically ordered.
coherence cohesion
Your essay tends to introduce new points within the same paragraph, which can confuse the reader. Ensure that each paragraph has a single focus and that all sentences within it relate directly to that main point. Transitions between paragraphs could also be smoother.
task achievement
You need to make sure that your essay fully responds to the task prompt by addressing all parts of the question. In this essay, while you have recognized differing views, your own stance needs to be clearer throughout the essay. Make sure to reiterate your opinion in the conclusion for a strong finish.
task achievement
Your essay should include specific examples to support the main points. These examples should be detailed and relevant, demonstrating a direct link to the argument you are making. Avoid overly general statements and ensure that your examples are strong enough to support your points effectively.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
