Some people say that the experiences a child has before starting school have the most influence on their future life. Others say that experiences as a teenager, especially at school, are more influential. Discuss both views and give your own opinion?

#people #experiences #child #school #influence #future #life #teenager

While

enhancing human well-being

trough

Correct your spelling

through

show examples

science

is important, I believe that by no

mean

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means

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should it be solely the primary goal of

science

. Equally

importent

Correct your spelling

important

are safeguarding the

environment

and

repecting

Correct your spelling

respecting

animal rights. In the practice of

science

, the improvement of human lives should never come at the cost of

environment

Add an article

the environment

show examples

. As the world's population increases, creating

better

Add an article

a better

show examples

way

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ways

show examples

to produce food,

sush

Correct your spelling

such

as more effective

pesidices

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residences

become

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becomes

show examples

vatal

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vital

fatal

. Yet, if

teh

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the

focus remains solely on boosting

make

Wrong verb form

making

show examples

the land infertile, the

importance

Replace the word

important

show examples

of taking

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to take

show examples

a balanced approach to scientific advancement that

focus

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focuses

show examples

on caring for both human lives and the

healeh

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health

of the

environment

that they depend on.

Furthermore

teating

Correct your spelling

treating

testing

drugs on animals

raises

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raise

show examples

serious ethical concerns.

Ensure

Wrong verb form

Ensuring

show examples

the safety of novel medicines for human use is critical, but prioritizing human health over animal rights is morally unacceptable. Animals, much like

human

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humans

show examples

, experience emotions and share the right to live freely and without unnecessary suffering. Subjecting them to prolonged captivity solely for testing can result in both physical and psychological suffering. As moral beings, we have a

reponsibility

Correct your spelling

responsibility

traet

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treat

animals compassionately and avoid

such

acts of brutality in the name of human betterment. In conclusion,

although

imroving

Correct your spelling

improving

people's

life

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lives

show examples

is an

improtant

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important

aim of

science

, I believe that it should not overshadow

other

Change the wording

another votal objective

other votal objectives

show examples

votal

Correct your spelling

vital

objective within the field. We must

also

give equal priority to

environment

Replace the word

environmental

show examples

reservation

Correct your spelling

preservation

show examples

and animal welfare,

stricking

Correct your spelling

striking

a balance between scientific progress and ethics for a better world.

Submitted by yuxinyun_2023 on Sun Jan 07 2024

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task achievement

The essay does not adequately address the given prompt as it deviates significantly from the topic. The prompt asks for a discussion on whether the experiences of childhood or teenage years have a more influential impact on an individual's future life. However, the essay discusses the goals of science and its moral implications instead. To improve, make sure to thoroughly read the prompt and address the specific question asked, providing a balanced discussion of both viewpoints as well as your own opinion.

coherence cohesion

It appears that the essay lacks a clear logical structure and coherence. The progression of ideas is not evident, and there are issues with paragraphing and transition devices. To enhance coherence and cohesion, organize ideas into clear paragraphs, each with a central theme, and use appropriate linking words to connect ideas smoothly.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
31Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

244 words

<40

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

influence
future life
experiences
childhood development
bonding
socialization
peer interactions
basic skills
education
learning
friendships
independence
identity
exposure
new ideas
perspectives

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Some people say that the experiences a child has before starting school have the most influence on their future life. Others say that experiences as a teenager, especially at school, are more influential. Discuss both views and give your own opinion?

Fully explain your ideas

Few people, or some people, believe that the government should provide benefits to the unemployed, whereas others believe the opposite.Please state your opinion.

Studying with a group of students in a classroom is more beneficial than learning online at home. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

2.Some people think children have the freedom to make mistakes, while other people believe that adults should prevent children from making mistakes. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

In some countries levels of health and fitness are decreasing and average weights are increasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what are some possible solutions?

In some countries, there has been an increase in the number of parents who educate their children themselves at home instead of sending them to school. Do you think the advantages of this overweight the disadvantages?