IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Many monuments, which are a part of our cultural diversity are protected and reconstructed by law. A few people think these structures should be destroyed and something new should be constructed. How important is it to put more effort into monument maintenance? Do you think that through their maintenance, history is coming in the way of progress?

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Use synonyms
Monument
Correct article usage
A monument
show examples
 is something that represents the
history
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 of a culture.Many
Monuments
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 are reconstructed and protected by law because these are an important part of our cultural diversity. I think
Monuments
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 should be maintained because it helps to preserve our cultural heritage. In terms of encouraging the maintenance of
monuments
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, it should be maintained to preserve our cultural heritage for future generations.
For example
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,
monuments
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 in our
country
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such
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 as Shahid Minar portray our International Mother Language Day. In 1952, the people of our
country
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 fought for our mother tongue and shed their blood. People of
this
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 generation get to know the
history
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 because of the
monument
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’s existence. When we look at the
monument
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, it reminds us where we came from. It tells us everything without us having been told something.
However
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, as we already know the importance of
monument
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 maintenance, our efforts should be put into it.
Secondly
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,
Monuments
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 carry the identity of our
country
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. We delve into our
history
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 by researching the
monuments
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. As it represents the exact story that occurred in the past. We get to come across the reason behind a
history
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, people who are involved and so on. The chief role those
monuments
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 play is to not let us forget the
history
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 and make us curious to do research.
For instance
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, if a person gets in touch with a
monument
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 but doesn't know the reason for its existence, he will be attracted to know its
history
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.
This
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 is how a
monument
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 helps a
history
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 to be unforgettable .
To conclude
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,
Monuments
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 play
such
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 a vital role in preserving cultural diversity. As we know it exerted a great influence on preserving our heritage for the future and caring for the identity of our
country
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.

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coherence cohesion
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coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion should be clear and reflect each other, successfully encapsulating your essay's main points and providing closure to your argument.
coherence cohesion
Back up your main points with clear supportive arguments and evidence. While you have mentioned some examples, strive to expand on these and thoroughly explain how they support your main argument.
task achievement
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task achievement
Develop your ideas comprehensively by explaining and elaborating on them in detail. Avoid superficial or underdeveloped points that do not contribute to a clear understanding of the topic.
task achievement
Use relevant and specific examples to illustrate your points. Generic statements should be avoided; instead, provide detailed instances that clearly relate to the task and reinforce your arguments.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cultural heritage
  • Preservation
  • Restoration
  • Architectural integrity
  • Tourism industry
  • Intangible cultural value
  • Adaptive reuse
  • Urban development
  • Heritage conservation
  • Archaeological significance
  • Sustainable development
  • Antiquity
  • Ephemeral
  • History enthusiasts
  • Contemporary relevance
  • Innovation
  • Obsolescence
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