In today's world many people own a smartphone. Do you think the advantages of owning a smartphone outweight the disadvantages?
In the modern digital day, each person has their own smartphone. In my point of view, the drawback that
people
might be scammed Use synonyms
in
the Change preposition
on
Internet
is outweighed by the advantages which help humans to connect to others in the world and Use synonyms
access
Use synonyms
to
the Change preposition
apply
Internet
everywhere.
Use synonyms
Firstly
, Linking Words
smartphones
can connect humans in the world together. By the way, to explain, there are some social apps like Facebook, Twitter or Instagram, which can help Use synonyms
people
make more friends on the social network and share their special moments with others. Use synonyms
For example
, Linking Words
community
usually share some spectacular views when they travel somewhere and other social users can see and share their feelings so that they can know each other and be friends on the social network. Add an article
the community
Thus
, Linking Words
people
can be connected to each other by Use synonyms
smartphones
.
Use synonyms
Moreover
, humans can Linking Words
access
the Use synonyms
Internet
everywhere with just a smartphone. Use synonyms
In other words
, the population who use Linking Words
smartphones
can connect to the Use synonyms
Internet
in all places with Wi-Fi for searching for information, chatting with friends or more. Use synonyms
Additionally
, the Linking Words
Internet
is Use synonyms
also
a convenient tool to help Linking Words
people
in many fields. Use synonyms
For example
, students can use the Linking Words
Internet
to learn knowledge or teachers can be helped by the Use synonyms
Internet
to prepare for lessons. Thereby, Use synonyms
smartphones
allow Use synonyms
people
to Use synonyms
access
the Use synonyms
Internet
everywhere they want.
Use synonyms
However
, Linking Words
The
Correct article usage
apply
Internet
Use synonyms
user
might be caught by scammers. To explain, the Fix the agreement mistake
users
Internet
always has scammers, who want to put users into traps and take their information or money. Use synonyms
As a result
, they can get into debt because the heavy loans suddenly appear in their bank account. But Linking Words
this
problem can be solved by educating the user about Linking Words
Internet
scammers and ways to prevent it.
In conclusion, Use synonyms
smartphones
can help Use synonyms
people
connect to others and Use synonyms
access
the Use synonyms
Internet
everywhere, which can outweigh the drawbacks of being scammed on the Use synonyms
Internet
. So ,owning a smartphone nowadays is necessary and brings more benefits than disadvantages.Use synonyms
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coherence cohesion
Ensure you have a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Your essay has a recognizable structure, but the introduction could better prepare the reader for the arguments that will follow, and the conclusion could more forcefully summarise the main points.
coherence cohesion
Develop each paragraph with one clear main idea and use cohesive devices effectively, such as linking words and transition phrases. While the essay features some cohesion, further enhancement is needed through varied use of cohesive devices and clearer topic sentences to lead the reader through the argument.
task achievement
Address all parts of the task thoroughly, providing a balanced view if the question requires. While the essay attempts to discuss both the advantages and disadvantages of smartphone usage, the disadvantage is not explored enough and lacks depth. Be sure to analyse both sides to the required extent.
task achievement
Include relevant, specific examples to support your claims. Although some examples are given, they are quite general. Use concrete and precise examples to strengthen your arguments and provide real-world context.