In today’s world many people own a smartphone. Do you think the advantages of owning smartphone outweigh the disadvantages?

#today’s #world #people #smartphone

It is a controversial consideration that almost all citizens possess a

smartphone

due to

the development of technology.

This

device plays an important role in humans’ lives, especially in the 4.0 era.

However

, it

also

brings lots of serious consequences that all of us should notice.

This

writer believes that the advantages of owning a

smartphone

and keeping in touch with others far outweigh the drawbacks of

phone

addiction.

To begin

with, the

smartphone

is a modern device which has a large number of functions

such

as looking up information, surfing the Internet or contact with other

people

. It allowed us to access the Internet without fee and time-limited. In other words,

people

can use websites to browse every time they need their demands.

For example

, in the past,

people

had to go to mortar stores to purchase products that served their lives.

However

, nowadays,

people

just need to access the online marketplace on the

phone

which is not only convenient but

also

easy to exchange without moving.

Besides

, a

smartphone

also

an ideal device that helps

people

keep in touch with others.

This

gadget can make

phone

calls and send messages quickly but is not concerned about the distance.

As a result

people

can communicate and chat through social media

such

as Facebook, and Zalo all the time.

Thus

, mobile phones become a necessary part of our life.

However

, using a

phone

also

has lots of disadvantages.

People

easily become addicted to games online, and social media, especially at an early age can be affected seriously. Children cannot focus on their lessons or do not want to get on well with their friends, which leads to some dangerous diseases

such

as obesity, and autism. Taking everything into account, we cannot deny the advantages of mobile phones in our lives. The value the

phone

brings to us depends on the way we use it.

Mon Jan 08 2024

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coherence cohesion

Ensure each paragraph has a clear central idea and that the ideas flow logically from one to the next. Use cohesive devices to show the relationship between paragraphs and sentences.

coherence cohesion

Develop each main point with adequate support, including specific examples and detailed explanations, to strengthen the argument.

task achievement

Address the task prompt fully, ensuring that your response covers all aspects of the question. Your explanation of the advantages and disadvantages should be balanced to fully correspond with the prompt.

task achievement

Work on clear expression of ideas, ensuring they are presented comprehensively. Refrain from making over-generalized statements without proper support. Add depth to your arguments for a more compelling response.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

315 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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In today’s world many people own a smartphone. Do you think the advantages of owning smartphone outweigh the disadvantages?

Include an introduction and conclusion

In spite of techological advancement made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?

alternative energy sources that use the natural power of the wind, waves and sun are too expensive and complicated to replace the coal ,oil and gas that we use to power our cities and transport. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this option?

Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the place to learn this. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In their advertising, business nowadays usually emphasize that their products are new in some way Why is this, Do you think it is a positive or negative development?