In today's world many people own a smartphone. Do you think he advantages of owning a smartphone outweigh the disadvantages?
A common trend occurring frequently around the globe in all facets of society is everyone all have their private
smartphone
. While
the immediate sway towards owning one would be the
convenience, the inevitable drawbacks of Correct article usage
apply
time
and poor health greatly outweigh the upside.
One of the focal disadvantages of owning a phone would be
Wrong verb form
is
the
Correct article usage
apply
health related
issues. Those who Add a hyphen
health-related
cannot
have an ability to control themselves can overly spend Verb problem
do not
time
using smartphone
which tend to forget about taking care of their body, both physically and mentally. On the physical side, if Fix the agreement mistake
smartphones
people
cannot manage their time
to use Add an article
the phone
a phone
phone
, it will lead to sleep problems, reduced physical fitness, unhealthy eating habits, pain and migraines, reduced cognitive control and changes in the brain's Fix the agreement mistake
phones
gray
matter volume. Change the spelling
grey
Likewise
, people
's mental strength can be noticeably affected as well from difficulties in cognitive-emotion regulation, impulsivity, impaired cognitive function, addiction to social networking, shyness and low self-esteem.
Another negative aspect of owning a smartphone
would be the distance it bridges between family,
or even friends. Remove the comma
apply
In other words
, if
on some Correct word choice
apply
occasion
, Fix the agreement mistake
occasions
people
just hold their phones on
hand which Change preposition
in
allowing
little to no Wrong verb form
allows
time
and connection with different people
. This
scenario can be witnessed everywhere, with children growing up to adults. However
, in some cases, smartphone
can increase productivity and efficiency in communication, connect everybody from all over the world together and Fix the agreement mistake
smartphones
build
strengthen the way Verb problem
apply
people
from far distance
interact with each other.
In conclusion, despite the benefits Fix the agreement mistake
distances
from
convenience or Change preposition
of
connect
easily, the drawbacks of possessing a Wrong verb form
connecting
smartphone
can be
greatly impact one's personal life if not managed well, from health to Unnecessary verb
apply
relationship
in society.Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
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coherence cohesion
Ensure your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. While your logical structure is mostly consistent, think about using your introduction to accurately paraphrase the question and clearly state your position.
task achievement
Your essay's main points should be well-developed and expanded upon with specific examples. This essay could benefit from a more balanced discussion of both advantages and disadvantages, with relevant examples to support your ideas.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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