In today’s world many people own a smartphone. Do you think the advantage of owning a smartphone outweigh the disadvantages?
A common trend frequently around the globe in all facets of society is that
smartphones
belong to each individual. While
smartphones
support our lives becoming more facile, the inevitable drawback of using phones is that people
who are able to focus on smartphones
too much, affect negatively on their activity and body clock.
One of the focal advantages of owning a phone is connecting with everybody. Presently, people
who settle in distant places to work and live close to their relatives find it difficult. Hence
, people
need a smartphone to contact with their friends and family. For example
, if you live in HCM City while
your home is located in Ha Noi Capital, how do you connect with your parents or siblings? The best way is to connect by phone.
Moreover
, smartphones
contain a lot of convenience for personal demand including entertaining, working, studying, etc. Additionally
, gaining some knowledge on smartphones
helps you gain more opportunities to improve your technical skills.
One of the inexorable disadvantages of possessing a phone is that the young generation depends on smartphones
too much. It will destroy their biological clock which is an aspect of improving their body. For instance
, nowadays, students usually stay up late to use society or chat with their friends. Not only it will affect badly on their body but also
affects their education extensively.
Despite these disadvantages, I believe that the advantages of owning a smartphone far outweigh the disadvantages. Smartphones
provide people
with a way to stay connected with others, access information, and be entertained. While
it is important to be mindful of the potential distractions and addictive qualities of smartphones
, I believe that the benefits of owning one are clearSubmitted by [email protected]
on
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Coherence & Cohesion
To improve the logical structure of your essay, ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea that is developed logically, with each sentence building on the previous one. Transitions between ideas could be smoother and more cohesive.
Coherence & Cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are present, but they could be stronger. The introduction should explicitly state the two sides of the argument and your thesis. The conclusion should summarise your main points without introducing new information.
Coherence & Cohesion
To better support your main points, include more detailed examples and evidence. Each main point should be elaborated on with specific information that illustrates and strengthens your argument.
Task Achievement
Ensure to fully address the task by providing a balanced discussion on both advantages and disadvantages of the topic. You could expand on each point by providing more detail and evaluate the significance of both sides more clearly.
Task Achievement
Ideas are present but not fully developed. Aim to express your ideas clearly and with more depth. This can be done by explaining the reasoning behind your arguments and discussing possible implications or contrasting views.
Task Achievement
Include examples that are relevant and specific to the topic to illustrate your points. They help to demonstrate the validity of your arguments. Use real-world situations or anecdotal evidence that are directly related to the topic of smartphones.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.