In today's world many people own a smartphone. Do you thik the advantages of owning a smartphone outweight the disadvantages.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In
modern
Add an article
the modern
show examples
era,
smartphones
Use synonyms
have
bbecome
Correct your spelling
become
one
Correct determiner usage
a
show examples
part of our
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
and bring lots of
convenient
Replace the word
convenience
show examples
.
This
Linking Words
auther
Correct your spelling
author
believe
Correct subject-verb agreement
believes
show examples
that the benefits of access to
information
Use synonyms
easilly
Correct your spelling
easily
and
bring
Wrong verb form
bringing
show examples
entertainment to everyone
throughout
Change preposition
through
show examples
the smartphone can exceed the disadvantages of distraction at work.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
information
Use synonyms
is very critical
nowdays
Correct the word
nowadays
show examples
, and
smartphones
Use synonyms
can
povide
Correct your spelling
provide
access to a vast amount of
information
Use synonyms
via the
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
.
User
Fix the agreement mistake
Users
show examples
can research, read news and learn new skills through browsers.
For instance
Linking Words
, 90% of people
nowdays
Correct the word
nowadays
show examples
use GOOGLE to search
Use synonyms
information
Change preposition
for information
show examples
at
Change preposition
on
show examples
this
Linking Words
browser,
Correct pronoun usage
which bring
show examples
bring
Correct subject-verb agreement
brings
show examples
lots of
incomes
Fix the agreement mistake
income
show examples
for
this
Linking Words
company. Another advantage is
give
Wrong verb form
gives
show examples
individuals
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
various
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
ways to entertain themselves. Entertainment
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
a big impact
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
human life, and
smartphones
Use synonyms
can offer a range of entertainment options,
such
Linking Words
as streaming, listening to music and reading e-books.
As a result
Linking Words
, more and more people
owning
Wrong verb form
own
show examples
a smartphone to find a way
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
entertain themselves after a
hard-working
Correct your spelling
hard working
show examples
day.
However
Linking Words
, the drawback of using technology
such
Linking Words
as
smartphones
Use synonyms
can be
notice
Change the form of the verb
noticed
show examples
is
Correct your spelling
as
show examples
distraction
Add an article
a distraction
show examples
from work.
Althought
Correct your spelling
Although
it's
Unnecessary verb
it
show examples
can bring various
informations
Correct your spelling
information
for individuals, we can
be distract
Change the verb form
be distracted
be distracting
show examples
from
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
show examples
because there are
lots
Correct quantifier usage
lot
show examples
of
informations
Change the wording
information
pieces of information
show examples
on the Internet and we want to explore them all,
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
may contribute to social isolation when they replace face-to-face interaction. In conclusion, the advantages can
outweight
Correct your spelling
outweigh
the drawbacks in every
Fix the agreement mistake
field
show examples
fields
Fix the agreement mistake
field
show examples
and need to be
Wrong verb form
developed
show examples
develop
Wrong verb form
developed
show examples
more.
Submitted by [email protected] on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Coherence & Cohesion
The essay should present ideas in a more organized and logically structured manner. Use clear paragraphs, each containing one main idea supported by specific evidence or examples. Ensure there is a logical flow between paragraphs and ideas.
Task Achievement
The response addresses the task and shows an attempt to discuss the advantages and disadvantages of smartphones. However, more depth and detail would strengthen the argument. Precise examples and further explanation of points raised are necessary to fully answer the question.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Instant communication
  • Access to information
  • GPS and mapping
  • Entertainment options
  • Health monitoring
  • Productivity apps
  • Privacy concerns
  • Social isolation
  • Overdependency
  • Health risks
  • Streaming services
  • Smartphone addiction
  • Cybersecurity threats
  • Instant messaging
  • Digital literacy
What to do next:
Look at other essays: