Some people belive that too many resources and attention are devoted to the protection of wild animals and birds. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #belive #resources #attention #protection #animals #birds

Urbanisation gives

an adverse hurdles

Correct the article-noun agreement

adverse hurdles

an adverse hurdle

show examples

to jungle

life

However

, individuals opine that steps are taken to save the

animals

and

birds

from

extension

Correct your spelling

extinction

show examples

such

as wild

life protection

Correct your spelling

Wildlife Protection

show examples

act

Capitalize word

Act

show examples

opening

Add an article

the opening

show examples

zoo

Fix the agreement mistake

zoos

show examples

,and education among citizens. I concur with

this

phenomenon. I will discuss my reasons in the upcoming paragraphs. The first reason is

application

Add an article

the application

an application

show examples

of wild

life protection

Correct your spelling

Wildlife Protection

show examples

act

Capitalize word

Act

show examples

. The government had imposed many act's whose main motive

Wrong verb form

was

show examples

to save the

saffari

Correct your spelling

safari

life

Animals

were killed

from

Change preposition

for

show examples

a long time for pleasure and food. Which can cause

extension

Correct article usage

the extension

show examples

of many spices.

For instance

, in India,

from

Change preposition

show examples

past

Correct article usage

the past

show examples

couple of years number of

animals

killed by humans

are

Verb problem

has

show examples

drastically

decrease

Wrong verb form

decreased

show examples

due to

the fines and legal action taken by public authorities.

In addition

this

zoo's

Change noun form

zoos

show examples

are in every city, where

lion

Fix the agreement mistake

lions

show examples

tiger

Fix the agreement mistake

tigers

show examples

monkey

Fix the agreement mistake

monkeys

show examples

pigeon

Fix the agreement mistake

pigeons

show examples

,and parrots are kept

securly

Correct your spelling

securely

. They are taken care

Change preposition

of by

show examples

trained employees.

Hence

this

great

intitative

Correct your spelling

initiative

leads to safe shelter and food for all those wild

inhabitats

Correct your spelling

inhabitants

. It leads to

safe guarding

Correct your spelling

safeguarding

show examples

their

life

Additionally

, the newspaper, internet ,and television play

vital

Add an article

a vital

show examples

role in educating people. Advertisements are

showns

Correct your spelling

shown

shows

every where

Correct your spelling

everywhere

show examples

which state the importance of

ecosystem

Correct article usage

the ecosystem

show examples

and if

this

chain

broken

Add the auxiliary verb

is broken

show examples

what are the negative effects to our environment. Schools

also

teach

kids'

Change noun form

kids

show examples

the benefits of

animals

and

birds

. eventually, the purpose

to spread

Change preposition

of spreading

show examples

knowledge is handled by every

individuals

Change to a singular noun

individual

show examples

only to maintain a balance in

ecosystem

Add an article

the ecosystem

an ecosystem

show examples

To sum up

, modernatisation damages

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

animals

and

birds

Change preposition

show examples

a higher extent many

birds

dudo

Correct article usage

the dudo

show examples

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

already gone but I firmly agree that, there are great

intitatives

Correct your spelling

initiatives

taken by

government

Correct article usage

the government

show examples

and media whose main motive

Add a missing verb

is to

show examples

spread

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

education to protect our jungle.

Submitted by kb781920 on Tue Jan 09 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement

To enhance Task Achievement, ensure that your essay fully addresses the prompt by providing a clear position throughout the response. Offer detailed explanations and relevant examples to back up your points. Stay focused on the topic without digressing, and ensure each paragraph contains one clear main idea with proper development.

Coherence and Cohesion

To improve Coherence and Cohesion, work on the logical flow and organization of your essay. Your paragraphs should be well-structured with clear topic sentences. Use a range of cohesive devices appropriately. Avoid repetition of ideas and aim for paragraph unity where each sentence contributes to the development of the main point.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
44Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

279 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

conservation
biodiversity
ecosystem
extinction
wildlife tourism
resource allocation
habitats
sustainable development
environmental education
charismatic species
international collaboration
invasive species
poaching
endangered/threatened
conservation efforts
wildlife management
conservation biology
ecological balance
species preservation
wildlife sanctuary
animal welfare
ecotourism
genetic diversity
natural heritage

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5.5
band
In some countries university students live at home with their family while they study, whereas in other countries students attend university in another city.Do you think the benefits of living away from home during university outweigh the disadvantages?
Some of the university students living with their parents during their study period, while others students choose to stay outside their hometown far away from their families. In my opinion, I think living in another city away from family and friends during study has more benefits then living among friends.
6
band
Some people think that young people should spend more and more of their free time with their families, and spend less time entertaining outside. Others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
A group of individuals speculate that juveniles should dedicate their time to family members. Also, advise them to reduce the amount of time amusing outside. Nevertheless, other people contend that this approach is fully incorrect. This essay will discuss whether spending a moment with their families is beneficial for youth or not.
5.5
band
In many parts of the world, some famous people are considered as 'role models' and they are having an increasing influence on the young. Is this a positive or negative development?
A majority of people believe that celebrators are considered "role models"and they have a huge impact on younger generations. This has led to the question of whether it is good or bad view. I think that, despite the advantages it brings, it still has some disadvantages.
<4
band
Nowadays celebrities earn more money than politicians. What are the reasons for this? Is it a positive or negative development? You should write at least 250 words.
These days, it has been noticed that public figures are been paid well compared to government officials and this can be due to the benefit of social media platforms and the attention they receive that allows them to get both national and international contracts. I think this is a positive development because it will encourage more people to go into professions that attract fame such as the entertainment industry
6.5
band
In many countries, traditional foods are being replaced by international fast foods. This is having a negative effect on both families and societies. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In a lot of nations, domestic cuisines are not widely used,while international junk foods have been broadly used.Although some people believe that this proliferation brought about some drawbacks, I am inclined to think neither.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Some people belive that too many resources and attention are devoted to the protection of wild animals and birds. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

In some countries university students live at home with their family while they study, whereas in other countries students attend university in another city.Do you think the benefits of living away from home during university outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people think that young people should spend more and more of their free time with their families, and spend less time entertaining outside. Others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In many parts of the world, some famous people are considered as 'role models' and they are having an increasing influence on the young. Is this a positive or negative development?

Nowadays celebrities earn more money than politicians. What are the reasons for this? Is it a positive or negative development? You should write at least 250 words.

In many countries, traditional foods are being replaced by international fast foods. This is having a negative effect on both families and societies. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+