Some people believe that history should be taught to children at school. Others however, believe that there are other subjects that are more relevant to children’s lives today. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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In recent times, some think that historical subjects should be taught to
students
at school,
while
others argue that they should be educated in other related
skills
to serve their daily practices. In my opinion,
although
history
has its importance, I agree that learning contemporary
skills
is more beneficial for
students
in today’s world. On one hand, those who believe that
history
should be taught argue that it is essential for young generations to understand past
events
to avoid the repetition of mistakes.
History
provides insights into the causes and consequences of significant
events
,
such
as wars, economic crises, and social changes.
For instance
, studying the Asian economic crisis of the
last
few decades,
also
known as the Tom Yum Kung crisis, helps
students
understand the impacts of mismanagement
,
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and the importance of economic stability.
Hence
,
history
teaches children the importance of understanding specific
events
and circumstances that lead to significant
events
, which can help them make more informed decisions in the future.
On the other hand
, I would argue that learning modern subjects, particularly information
technology
, is more relevant to
students
’ lives today. In the digital age, technological proficiency is crucial for academic and professional success. When they learn about
technology
, they acquire
skills
in using the internet for research, creating presentations, and employing various software applications. These
skills
are not only useful for their academic purposes but
also
invaluable in the workforce.
For example
, proficiency in Microsoft Office Suite, coding, and digital communication platforms are highly sought after in many careers.
In addition
,
technology
education promotes problem-solving and creativity, as
students
navigate and utilize different tools to achieve their goals. In conclusion,
while
it is true that
history
provides a variety of useful lessons to children. I would argue that all children should learn about relevant
skills
,
such
as information
technology
as it is a valuable source of knowledge in today's world. These
skills
equip them with the necessary tools to excel academically and professionally, ensuring that they are prepared for the challenges and opportunities in the future.
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task achievement
You've managed to present and discuss both views clearly and effectively, meeting the requirements of the task. To reach a 9, focus on refining the depth of your analysis and further elaborating on each viewpoint.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear and logical structure. To improve further, ensure that each idea flows seamlessly into the next by possibly using more varied and sophisticated linking words.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are clear and provide a comprehensive overview of your stance and the discussed views.
task achievement
You've used relevant and specific examples effectively to support your main points, which strengthens your argument.
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