Some people believe that history should be taught to children at school. Others however, believe that there are other subjects that are more relevant to children’s lives today. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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In recent times, some think that historical subjects should be taught to
students
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at school,
while
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others argue that they should be educated in other related
skills
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to serve their daily practices. In my opinion,
although
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history
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has its importance, I agree that learning contemporary
skills
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is more beneficial for
students
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in today’s world. On one hand, those who believe that
history
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should be taught argue that it is essential for young generations to understand past
events
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to avoid the repetition of mistakes.
History
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provides insights into the causes and consequences of significant
events
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,
such
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as wars, economic crises, and social changes.
For instance
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, studying the Asian economic crisis of the
last
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few decades,
also
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known as the Tom Yum Kung crisis, helps
students
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understand the impacts of mismanagement
,
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and the importance of economic stability.
Hence
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,
history
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teaches children the importance of understanding specific
events
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and circumstances that lead to significant
events
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, which can help them make more informed decisions in the future.
On the other hand
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, I would argue that learning modern subjects, particularly information
technology
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, is more relevant to
students
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’ lives today. In the digital age, technological proficiency is crucial for academic and professional success. When they learn about
technology
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, they acquire
skills
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in using the internet for research, creating presentations, and employing various software applications. These
skills
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are not only useful for their academic purposes but
also
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invaluable in the workforce.
For example
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, proficiency in Microsoft Office Suite, coding, and digital communication platforms are highly sought after in many careers.
In addition
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,
technology
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education promotes problem-solving and creativity, as
students
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navigate and utilize different tools to achieve their goals. In conclusion,
while
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it is true that
history
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provides a variety of useful lessons to children. I would argue that all children should learn about relevant
skills
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,
such
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as information
technology
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as it is a valuable source of knowledge in today's world. These
skills
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equip them with the necessary tools to excel academically and professionally, ensuring that they are prepared for the challenges and opportunities in the future.
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task achievement
You've managed to present and discuss both views clearly and effectively, meeting the requirements of the task. To reach a 9, focus on refining the depth of your analysis and further elaborating on each viewpoint.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear and logical structure. To improve further, ensure that each idea flows seamlessly into the next by possibly using more varied and sophisticated linking words.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are clear and provide a comprehensive overview of your stance and the discussed views.
task achievement
You've used relevant and specific examples effectively to support your main points, which strengthens your argument.
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