some people think that hosting an international sporting event is beneficial for a country while others disagree. Do the advantages of hosting major sporting events outweigh the disadvantages?
Todays
generation shows more interest in the sports game Change to a genitive case
Today's
instead
of watching other shows. some individuals believe that inviting other country
sports team
for sporting Fix the agreement mistake
teams
event
is more beneficial but at the same Fix the agreement mistake
events
time
others think that it is not a good idea to host international sporting Add a comma
time,
event
in our Fix the agreement mistake
events
country
.
To begin
with, hosting
Correct article usage
the hosting
country
will generate revenue by attracting numerous tourists who have keen
interest in sports and Add an article
a keen
along with
the country
, other small businesses will also
get
Verb problem
apply
benefited
by selling basic necessities Wrong verb form
benefit
such
as food, accomodation
and Correct your spelling
accommodation
also
travel facilities.In addition
to this
, it will become the
entertainment source for many, as people are living so busy life and do not get Correct article usage
an
chance
to see Correct article usage
a chance
such
entertainment events
where they can release their stress. however
, these kind
of Change the determiner
this kind
these kinds
events
will help them to enjoy some of their life moments.
Furthermore
, it also
has some drawbacks as in these big events
people disturb the daily life activities of local
- traffic become the major Fix the agreement mistake
locals
problems
and they cannot go to work on time and Fix the agreement mistake
problem
also
crowd
will make the city dirty by throwing garbage on the streets.
Fix the agreement mistake
crowds
To sum up
, country
will get financial profit and provide a source of enjoyment to the people so, the pros of hosting special sporting Add an article
the country
events
outweigh the cons.Submitted by jaspreet702kaur on
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task achievement
The introduction does not clearly state your position on the topic. It's important to make your stance clear in response to the essay question.
task achievement
The essay lacks a clear overview and thesis statement in the introduction. To improve, include a sentence that outlines the main advantages and disadvantages you will discuss.
task achievement
You need to develop your arguments more fully. The advantages and disadvantages mentioned are not explored in depth with specific details or examples.
coherence cohesion
The essay lacks clear and logical transitions between points and paragraphs. To achieve coherence, use cohesive devices and clear topic sentences for each paragraph.
coherence cohesion
Avoid general statements - both your introduction and conclusion should reflect the specific content of your essay and your viewpoint.
coherence cohesion
It's essential that you expand on your main points by using examples and explanations to support your arguments, giving the reader a clear understanding of your reasoning.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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