Some people say that the advertisements extremely successful at persuading us to buy things, others think advertisements is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both the views and give your opinion.

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There is no denying the fact that in nowadays modern era, living with a variety of adverts.

While

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it is a commonly held belief that

such

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commercials

Use synonyms

have a main role in ever-growing consumerism, there is

also

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an argument that some individuals think that it is so common and people do not notice them.

This

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essay will analyse

this

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topic from both points of view and express my opinion. ‏On the one hand, nowadays people spend most of their time in the digital world,

such

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as television or the internet, so they may get attracted to certain eye-catching advertisements.

In other words

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, most companies, for a high profit, would make their commodity promotions seductive and powerful.

In addition

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to improving the credibility of those advertisements, they may

also

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include some real user reviews, thereby getting customer’s trust.

For example

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, a survey conducted in the UK shows that 90% of customers are tempted to purchase, when they see real user reviews. ‏

On the other hand

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, some individuals would not pay attention to those advertisements. It is

also

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possible to say that the only trust in

commercials

Use synonyms

they have is personal experience.

Moreover

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, if something happens beyond their expectations, some would neglect

such

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those

Correct determiner usage

apply

show examples

commercials

Use synonyms

For instance

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, in 2020, a case filed in the Riyadh court questioning the quality of a well-known eyelash oil alleged that the constant use of that oil made him blind in one eye. ‏In conclusion, there are no easy answers to

this

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question. On balance,

however

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, I tend to believe that

commercials

Use synonyms

play a crucial role in persuading us to purchase products.

mnm_234Wed Mar 05 2025

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Task Achievement

Try to make your thesis statement clearer in the introduction. Consider explicitly stating your opinion on the matter.

Coherence and Cohesion

Use a wider range of cohesive devices to link ideas together. For example, instead of 'on the one hand' and 'on the other hand', you might use other phrases to create variety and flow between your ideas.

Coherence and Cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph starts with a clear topic sentence that outlines its main idea. This will help improve the logical structure.

Task Achievement

You have presented both sides of the argument well, showing an understanding of different viewpoints.

Task Achievement

Your use of examples, such as the survey and the court case, enhances your essay and adds credibility to your points.

11
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

265 words

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Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.