Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #parents #children #members #society #school #place

There is no denying the fact that

children

have to

learned

Change the verb

learn

show examples

how to be good members of society.

While

it is a commonly held belief that

parents

should hold

this

mission and teach their kids how to be beneficial citizens, there is

also

an argument that

school

is the place to learn

this

This

essay will analyse

this

topic from both points of view, and express my opinion. On

one

Correct article usage

the one

show examples

hand,

children

spend the majority of their

time

with their

parents

In other words

parents

have a significant role in influencing their kids.

In addition

parents

are responsible

about

Change preposition

for

show examples

forming their

children

's personalities.

For example

the

Change preposition

in the

show examples

first five years of someone's life, they will be with their

parents

all the

time

which makes them

Change preposition

apply

show examples

heroes in their

children

's eyes, so they will start coping

their

Change preposition

with their

show examples

parents

' actions.

On the other hand

school

teachers are more specialized in teaching techniques. It is

also

possible to say that

parents

could inquire for teacher advice in some situations.

Moreover

, the

time

that students spend at

school

also

a long

time

therefore

, they will definitely learn new things from the

school

environment.

For instance

, the student may face some bad situations or problems with their colleagues, in

such

situations, teachers should guide them. In conclusion, there are no easy answers to

this

question. On balance,

however

, I tend to believe that both

parents

and schools play a crucial role in generating good society members, and they should both realize the importance of their role.

Submitted by shaymaa.khalaf91 on Wed Jan 10 2024

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coherence cohesion

Ensure you have a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Elaborate on your main points to better support your arguments and enhance the reader's understanding.

task achievement

Stay focused on the task throughout the essay. Fully develop your ideas with more specific examples to better demonstrate your understanding of the topic and strengthen your arguments.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

252 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

good members of society
teach
parents
schools
responsibility
values
respect
empathy
responsibility
formal education
citizenship
ethics
social responsibility
lead by example
role models
conducive environment
extracurricular activities
community involvement
collaborate
holistic approach

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Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Nowadays, a growing number of peole with health problems are trying alternative nedicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Some people think that travel is necessary to learn about other nations,others ,however think that tv and internet is the best way to learn.Discuss both views and give your opinion

Some people believe that those moving to abroad should try to adopt themselves to the new cultures while others think there is no need to do so. Discuss both the views and give your opinion

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Research shows that some activities are good for health and others are bad.Despite knowing that millions of people engage in unhealthy activites. What is the cause of this? What can be done?