IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

It is better to buy just a few expensive clothes, rather than lots of cheaper clothes. Do you agree or disagree?

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Spending
money
Use synonyms
 on a few expensive Shirts, trousers or skirts is better than spending
money
Use synonyms
 on cheaper
clothes
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 essay agrees with
this
Linking Words
 point of view because expensive
clothes
Use synonyms
 might have
better
Add an article
a better
the better
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 quality that does not affect the skin and lasts longer. Many
people
Use synonyms
 prefer buying high-cost jackets, trousers or any kind of
clothes
Use synonyms
 rather than less expensive
clothes
Use synonyms
 for many reasons. One of the primary reasons is that
high-qualityquality
Correct your spelling
high-quality
 outfits are made of expensive fabrics
such
Linking Words
 as snake's skin, worms's silk or organic cotton.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, most cheaper
clothes
Use synonyms
 are made of low-qualityquality materials like polyester and rayon which might cause many types of skin allergies.
For example
Linking Words
, a clothing website, SHEIN,
is selling
Wrong verb form
sells
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 cheap products which resulted in many negative reviews from
the
Correct article usage
apply
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customers that they were complaining about the redness and itchiness of their
skins
Fix the agreement mistake
skin
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 after trying them.
In addition
Linking Words
, costly wear might
last
Linking Words
 longer and some pieces can be inherited because of that
people
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 prefer to spend their
money
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 on expensive
clothes
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 rather than cheaper
clothes
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.
In other words
Linking Words
,
people
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 who can buy a jacket that costs 1000$, in the future their children can wear it or sell it at the same price,
while
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 if the person bought a jacket priced 100$, it might get damaged after using it for some months and it will be useless.
To sum up
Linking Words
, many
people
Use synonyms
 would
consume
Verb problem
spend
show examples
 their
money
Use synonyms
 on high-priced
clothes
Use synonyms
 rather than lower-priced
clothes
Use synonyms
due to
Linking Words
high-qualityquality
Correct your spelling
high-quality
 materials and it
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 longer lasting.

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structure
Ensure your essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. Your introduction and conclusion are present but could be more developed. Specifically, clarify your thesis statement in the introduction.
cohesion
Use cohesive devices appropriately to help your essay flow better. You may want to vary your linking words and phrases to improve coherence.
development
Organize the body of your essay into clear paragraphs, each with a central idea that is well supported by examples and reasons. Link these ideas back to the thesis statement.
task response
Fully respond to the task by giving a balanced view. Here, you could have acknowledged why some people might disagree with the viewpoint presented.
accuracy
Pay attention to spelling, particularly with repeated words (e.g., 'qualityquality' should be 'quality'). This affects the perception of your lexical resource and grammar.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • sustainability
  • long-lasting
  • cost-per-wear
  • economical
  • investing
  • ethical manufacturing
  • transparent
  • exclusivity
  • designs
  • mass-produced
  • accessibility
  • budget
  • fast fashion
  • trends
  • maintenance
  • dry cleaning
  • social status
  • psychological implications
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