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Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

#countries #money #poverty #aid
Developed nations are frequently seen providing economic
assistance
 to third-world
countries
.
However
, it does not always help reduce poverty;
therefore
, it is argued that less affluent nations must be provided with an alternative form of aid which will help them in the long run.
This
 essay discusses why developing
countries
 can be better off from
such
assistance
 and the types of help offered.
Firstly
, when developed
countries
 give
money
 to undeveloped
countries
, it will help citizens in these
countries
 solve short-term problems, and it will not
last
 long. When inhabitants in emerging
countries
 receive
money
 from donations, they use it to pay the temporary
cost
Fix the agreement mistake
costs
show examples
 or issues.
For instance
, in 2005, the United States donated about 20 billion to some undeveloped
countries
, but still, it only helped people solve the problem f for two months. After two months, they continued poorly.
Moreover
, developed
countries
 should invest in healthcare and education rather than loan
money
 to other
countries
. When the younger generation receives a quality education and everyone has access to proper medical treatment and hospitality, it will help eliminate unemployment and prevent people from resorting to unlawful activities. So developed
countries
 must avail in building good schools, universities, and hospitals.
Moreover
, they can help stabilize the government in these
countries
 and monitor whether the political environment is conducive to growth.
Although
money
 helps feed the hungry lot, it is only a temporary solution.
However
, before providing help with other aid to developing
countries
, developed
countries
 should give financial
assistance
 to developing
countries
 because people say that
money
 does solve most problems. To summarize, I favour the opinion that rich
countries
 should provide practical help to improve the economic status of developing
countries
.
However
, financial
assistance
 can only help to a certain extent and is not the definite way to eliminate poverty.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and logically progress from one idea to the next, which your essay sometimes lacks. Strive for a more cohesive structure by connecting sentences and ideas more smoothly.
task achievement
Expand on your main points with more detailed, relevant examples and explanations to better support your argument. Each point should be fully developed and not leave the reader with unanswered questions.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • poverty alleviation
  • economic inequality
  • developing nations
  • foreign aid
  • sustainable growth
  • technical assistance
  • expertise
  • infrastructure
  • education
  • fair trade
  • trade barriers
  • sustainable development
  • environmental conservation
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