Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#people #music #cultures #ages

Some would argue that

music

attracts many

cultures

and

people

of different

ages

. I strongly agree with

this

statement because

music

festivals

are a good option to promote the

cultures

of countries and are a great activity to enjoy with the whole family.

Music

festivals

are an activity

practiced

Change the spelling

practised

show examples

around the world.

This

allowed many

people

from different places to know the culture of the country which organized the festival and

also

to get

along with

many other

cultures

. Scotland is well known for its folk

festivals

where many

people

around the world can enjoy parades, the

music

, the instruments, and the dances of

this

fabulous nation,

also

tasting food and a diversity of beers and other beverages. Activities for the whole family are a good option to gather

people

of different

ages

such

as children, teenagers, and adults, who can enjoy together

music

festivals

that offer plays for everybody and

Fix the infinitive

apply

show examples

share experiences of life. In Argentina, in summer, there are a lot of

festivals

to enjoy with family. One of the most important

festivals

is organized by the province of Mendoza and is related to the end of the grape harvest to start the wine production characteristic of

this

place.

People

of many

cultures

and

ages

enjoy the festival watching native dances and recitals that include folk

music

and international artists' performances.

To conclude

music

festivals

are one of the best options to share different

cultures

and to gather

people

of all

ages

, giving a sensation of union and brotherhood.

Submitted by daniruspi on Wed Nov 13 2024

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coherence cohesion

The essay is well-structured with clear paragraphs, but you might consider using linking words or phrases to enhance the flow between ideas.

task achievement

Ensure that each paragraph clearly supports your thesis statement and that all examples directly relate to your main points.

introduction conclusion present

The introduction clearly states your position, and the conclusion effectively summarizes your main ideas.

relevant specific examples

You provide specific examples from different countries which enrich your arguments.

complete response

The essay comprehensively addresses the task and provides a clear opinion on the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

252 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

universal language
evoke
connect
diverse audiences
cultural exchange
generational gaps
shared experiences
unifying force

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Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people think that wealth is the best way to judge wether someone is successful. What is your opinion?

The government has the responsibility to ensure the safety of its citizens. Therefore, some people think that the government should increase spending on defense but spend less on social benefits. To what extent do you agree?

In spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?

The government should pay for the course fees for everyone who wants to study at the university. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement.